


Shifting Loyalties

by TAFKAmayle



Category: Original Work
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Anal Sex, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Crimes & Criminals, Intersex, Knotting, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mpreg, Omega Verse, Oral Sex, Past Rape/Non-con, Rape/Non-con Elements, Shapeshifting, Vaginal Sex, referenced miscarriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:48:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 15
Words: 21,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27771010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TAFKAmayle/pseuds/TAFKAmayle
Summary: Ryan, an alpha wolf-shifter, happens upon Jeremy, an unusual omega mountain lion shifter, during one of his heats. Due to Ryan’s infertility, Jeremy eagerly accepts him as his alpha. Ryan does his best to be a good alpha to Jeremy, but it seems Jeremy’s bad luck has yet to end.TW: This fic contains a Ryan Haywood character.Note about rape/non-con: There is an inexplicit attempted rape where two people talk about forcing Jeremy, but nothing is described. There is also references to past rape later in the story, but again not explicitly described. Please be cautious reading.Dedicated to Mel, my ex-patron saint who I originally started this fic for a loooong time ago. I know they won’t see this, but I still wanted to make it known, I appreciated all your support. ❤️
Comments: 60
Kudos: 39





	1. Chapter 1

Ryan watched the mountain lion, struggling to keep herself up. She smelled so good. Her heat had to be bad if she was tempting a wolf. She yowled, rubbing against the grass and a new wave of the hot sex smell rolled over Ryan. He drooled and his cock throbbed between his legs. 

He moved towards her. It didn’t hurt to ask, right? She looked so miserable. She whimpered at his approach and put her ass in the air for him. Her brown eyes looked back at him. How long had she known he was there?

Then she growled and began to shift, body trembling. Ryan hastened to shift too, preferring human form to animal form in this sort of situation. But as the cat shifted, he noted this was not a female omega, but a male. Ryan licked his lips as he watched the cat drip from his pussy down over his balls to his hard cock. _A male omega. How rare._

Ryan tried to swallow his excess drool as he knelt behind him. He hesitated.

“Are you sure?” He asked, lightly touching the cat’s hip.

“Yes!” The cat snapped, “Get on with it!”

His hips rocked impatiently and Ryan leaned over him, nosing at his neck as his hands ran up the cat’s sides. _Breed,_ the wolf in Ryan urged. Ryan groaned as his hips jerked, sloppily rubbing his cock against the cat.

“Do you need a map?” The cat snorted.

“Watch it,” Ryan warned lowly as he got a hand down between them to guide himself.

“Or what?” The cat sneered.

Ryan jabbed forward roughly, his cock thrusting into the cat in one smooth slide. The cat groaned, back dipping and Ryan’s eyelids fluttered as his cunt squeezed, hot and wet around him. _Oh god._ The cat yowled and writhed under him, a fresh wave of slick flooding through him in response to Ryan’s cock. Ryan groaned lowly, filled suddenly with frantic need.

He covered the omega’s hands with his own where they were braced on the ground, nosing at his ear. He panted heavily as he humped the cat desperately. The omega groaned, tightening on Ryan’s cock and pulsing as his hips jerked. _God, he came on my cock, that’s so fucking hot._ Ryan’s knot swelled up, bumping at the cat’s entrance.

“Do  _not_ get stuck in me!” The cat growled.

“You’re no fun,” Ryan whined breathlessly.

“I will eat you if you get stuck!” The cat snapped, turning to snap at Ryan.

Ryan shuddered and jerked into him, moaning as he came and slumping against him. He nosed at his neck, licking him lightly.

“Fuck fuck fuck!” The cat groaned, “Fucking fuck!”

“What?? Are you okay??” Ryan huffed.

“You’re fucking heavy!” The cat wheezed.

“Fucking rude,” Ryan grumbled as he rolled off him.

The cat dropped his head to look between his legs.

“Goddamn, wolf!” He hissed, reaching between his legs, “If I get pregnant with abominations, I’m going to eat you!”

Then he stuck his fingers in his vagina and started pulling out Ryan’s come while Ryan just watched him in baffled silence.

“Can male omegas get pregnant?” He finally grunted.

The cat looked up, his shaggy, uneven black hair falling half over one of his pretty brown eyes as he glared at Ryan.

“Obviously,” he spat.

Ryan’s eyes trailed down to his belly.  Abs. He was very fit. Ryan wanted to see him swell up with babies. His cock twitched with interest in impregnating the omega. Even if he couldn’t do it.

“You  _are_ an alpha,” The cat groaned, “Great. Just my damn luck. This isn’t happening!  _We_ are not happening!”

“Yeah, I know,” Ryan muttered, rolling his eyes, “But anyway, I don’t think you can get pregnant by me. Canis and felis, right? No cross-breeding.”

“Usually,” The cat grunted, “Sometimes shifters fuck, nng, fuck shit up. Had some miscarriages with a fox.”

Ryan’s eyebrows went up at the casual way the omega dropped that bombshell on him. He didn’t even stop digging. Ryan cleared his throat.

“I, uh...I can’t...” he mumbled, “I...shoot blanks, as it were.”

The cat stopped, looking up.

“Wait, really?!” He demanded, “You’re infertile?!”

Ryan looked away, face red.

“Yes,” he mumbled.

The mountain lion tackled him, pushing all his air out with an eloquent “oof”. The cat’s pretty eyes were sparkling and he had the cutest grin. He was absolutely gorgeous like that.

“Let’s do it again!” He exclaimed, hands bracing on Ryan’s chest, “You can get stuck this time!”

“O-Okay,” Ryan squeaked.

Really, what the hell else was he supposed to say to that?? The cat’s sticky hand moved off Ryan’s chest to grasp his cock and get it to full hardness quickly. He slid down onto Ryan’s cock fluidly, his pussy still dripping wet. Ryan was dizzy at how quick they were at it again.  _Jesus, omegas are no joke._

“F-Fuck, you’re thick too,” The cat groaned as he moved up and down, “So good. I changed my mind. You can be my alpha. I accept you.”

“Uhh...b-but you’re a cat,” Ryan grunted, struggling to focus, “I-I’m a dog. We don’t m-mix.”

Not that he was having any issues with how they were currently mixing. The cat opened his eyes.

“We don’t?” He muttered, head tilting, “Since when?”

Ryan frowned at him.

“Do...Do you live alone out here?” He questioned.

The cat nodded.

“Y-You’ve never been into a city?” Ryan guessed, a bit breathless.

“I have,” the cat answered, “But not for more than a day or so since I was a cub.”

“Er...f-felids and canids have an-an intense rivalry,” Ryan explained, now a _lot_ breathless, “If-If, _fuck,_ I t-took you back into the city, m-my pack would lose their, nnh, th-their minds.”

“Then stay here,” the mountain lion suggested brightly, “There’s plenty of room here.”

Ryan almost immediately agreed. He was so close, he was willing to do whatever kept the cat bouncing on his cock like that. He hadn’t even remotely broken stride since he’d started. 

“I-I can come here f-for your heats,” Ryan offered shakily, “But I-I have to go home.”

The cat whined annoyance.

“Fine, I guess,” he grumbled, “What’s your name, Alpha?”

A shiver of pleasure ran through Ryan at the omega calling him Alpha. 

“R-Ryan.”

“I’m Jeremy,” the omega returned, “I’m about to peak again.”

Ryan gripped his hips as Jeremy pulsed and let out a whimper. His body shook and he swayed weakly. Ryan kept him moving on his cock as his knot swelled. The smell of Jeremy’s heat rolled over him, renewed and fresh. He was drooling again, so embarrassing.

“Knot me Alpha, I-I wanna feel y-your knot inside me!” Jeremy groaned, panting breathlessly.

_ Fuck. _ Ryan moaned through clenched teeth and pushed Jeremy down on his knot. Jeremy cried out and came as Ryan’s knot slipped inside him. Ryan jerked shallowly a few more times as he filled Jeremy. Jeremy was shivering as he braced himself on Ryan’s chest again. Ryan looked down at where Jeremy’s come had splattered onto his torso.

“C-Could you impregnate someone?” He wondered as he tried to catch his breath.

“Huh?” Jeremy mumbled, still swaying, “Oh, uh, I dunno, actually.”

Male omegas were intriguing. Ryan thought he should research them when he got back into LS. Especially if Jeremy was going to be his omega. And he really, really wanted to be Jeremy’s alpha. Who wouldn’t want to be? 

Jeremy shifted above him and laid on him, rubbing his face against Ryan’s chest. He didn’t seem to care about the stickiness between them or the way he had to fold his body up to lay like this. Ryan put his arms around him and brushed his hand through his hair. He looked sleepy and adorable now and Ryan smiled down at him. An omega who wanted him because he couldn’t get them pregnant, how perfect.

~

Ryan had the best nose of his whole pack, yet was still terrified one of them might smell Jeremy still on him. Four days he’d spent in the wild, fucking Jeremy like there was nowhere else for him to be. Four wasn’t a totally crazy amount of time for his isolation, but it was more than usual.  _Two_ was usual.

So he was accosted by the rest of the Fake AH Pack as soon as he stepped foot in the penthouse.

“Ryebread!” Gavin shrieked, immediately grabbing him around the middle.

Ryan shoved him away.

“I wasn’t gone that long,” he mumbled.

“What happened?” Geoff demanded.

“Needed extra time,” Ryan muttered as he moved toward the kitchen.

Not untrue. Technically.

“Well, it did wonders for you,” Jack laughed, “You didn’t even snap at anyone.”

Ryan rolled his eyes as he retrieved a Diet Coke.

“I’m not that much of an asshole, am I?” He grumbled.

He looked around at them as he pulled back from the fridge. All five of them were looking away from him, in various degrees of sheepishness. Ryan sighed, shoulders slumping and head dropping.  _Goddamnit. I’m a total asshole._

“Anyway, good to see you back safe, buddy,” Geoff spoke up, “There’s a problem that needs a Vagabond correction when you’re ready.”

“Yes, sir,” Ryan grunted.

Everyone dispersed except for Ray.

“Can I talk to you a minute?” He asked.

“Sure.”

Ray led him into the soundproof conference room and Ryan suddenly felt nervous.  _Oh boy. I’m in trouble._

“Alright, fess up,” Ray grumbled, hopping up onto the table, “What happened?”

“Wh-What do you mean?” Ryan mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Dude, you power washed something off yourself,” Ray snorted, “You did something you don’t want the others smelling. Plus you’re way more than just relaxed, you’re practically glowing. You had a sex holiday, didn’t you?”

Ryan _really_ didn’t want to lie to Ray.

“I-I don’t know if I’d call it that,” he muttered.

“Alright, what happened then?” Ray pressed.

“I...met an omega,” Ryan admitted.

“Whoa, congrats, dude!” Ray exclaimed, “I thought you hired a hooker or something! What’s she like?”

Ryan tried not to flinch.  _ She. _

“Uh...sh-short,” Ryan offered, looking away, “Beautiful.”

He smiled lightly.

“Sassy too,” he murmured, “Headstrong. Pretty no-nonsense. Though heats are... wet.”

Normal Jeremy was strong-willed while heat Jeremy was emotional.

“I think that’s the point,” Ray snickered.

Ryan blushed a bit.

“No, I-I meant tears,” he corrected.

“She cried?” Ray grunted, looking confused.

“Like a lot,” Ryan confirmed, “I, uh, I think it’s normal?”

“She was so overwhelmed by your alpha dick she couldn’t contain herself?” Ray deadpanned.

“Sh-Shut up!” Ryan huffed, “I’m going!”

Ray’s laughter followed him as he exited the room. He shook his head.  _Oh, I’m an asshole, huh? Well, I fit right in, don’t I?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First full on omega verse fic, so like cool, I guess.


	2. Chapter 2

Ryan counted down the days to Jeremy’s cycle like it was Christmas. It sort of felt like it was. He certainly had a lot of fun fucking Jeremy’s hot, wet hole so far. And cuddling him after they got tied together. Four days seemed like a lot and a little at the same time. Ryan missed him already, after only one meeting. While he waited, he looked up male omegas to prepare for seeing him again. It helped ease his impatience a bit.

It turned out male omegas _could_ impregnate others, provided they weren’t impotent like Ryan. Also apparently they tended to be even more emotional than female omegas on their heats. So Jeremy breaking down crying in the middle of them fucking and several times begging Ryan not to leave him alone, did _seem_ to be normal. Jeremy had said as much, but Ryan wanted to be sure he wasn’t doing something wrong.

Jeremy had insisted very adamantly that he didn’t mean any of the emotional things he’d said on his heat. Then very firmly (though tiredly) told Ryan to leave him the hell alone when his heat had finally passed. Which hurt a bit, but Ryan understood the desire for isolation and was grateful Jeremy was willing to see him at all.

Ryan had also looked up mountain lion shifters. Apparently they were much like normal mountain lions: territorial loners. It wasn’t exactly unusual for one to be found on their own in the wild. With all this new information, Ryan was sure now that Jeremy was mostly very normal. The only thing that was unusual was that for some reason he attracted canids as well as felids. 

He’d casually mentioned another few unfortunate incidents that confirmed this was not a one or two off. Some of them being more miscarriages and a hint at some unwanted attention from canids that Ryan wasn’t sure he wanted elaborated. But Ryan couldn’t find anything on felids attracting canids. Any time the two mated it seemed the dog was trying to dominate the cat for whatever reason, not that they were attracted by the cat’s pheromones.  


So Jeremy was mostly normal, but a little special. Maybe weird was a better word, but Ryan liked Jeremy and didn’t want to think poorly of him, even if it was only a little. Besides, it would be bad for an alpha to think poorly if their omega. 

Armed with his new knowledge, he felt a bit more confident as he made his way up the mountain trail near Jeremy’s cave. He was going to do his best to be the best alpha he could to match the best omega. He hoped he was good enough.

He’d just made it to the part where he couldn’t go any further on his bike when he heard Jeremy scream somewhere further up the trail. He wasn’t totally sure how he’d known it was Jeremy’s call, but he did and he did not hesitate to zip forward on the trail toward the noise. What was he doing on the trail?? He said he lived far out for a reason, that he didn’t like interacting with others. 

Ryan skidded to a stop, flipping off his engine as he got closer. _Voices._

“G-Get the hell away from me!” Jeremy shouted, “I will eat you!”

Ryan sniffed the air as he started for them. _Coyotes._

“Awe, that any way to treat someone tryin’ to show you a good time?” Someone sneered.

“Think the bitch is confused about having a choice,” another snorted.

Ryan’s whole being burned with rage.

“Y-You can’t touch me!” Jeremy cried, “I have a-an alpha! _Don’t!”_

“I don’t smell an alpha here now,” The first one laughed.

“You should get your nose checked then,” Ryan growled before slicing their throat.

He lifted their body and tossed it like the trash it was. Then, as the other started for him, he gripped their throat and yanked them into the air as well. They flailed as he crushed their windpipe and tossed them like the first. The entire time his eyes stayed on Jeremy who was shaking and sobbing, reaching weakly for him and mewling pathetically. Ryan’s chest was hot and tight with the desire to protect and comfort him. 

He took off his jacket to put on Jeremy’s shivering naked body before he scooped him up. Jeremy held onto him as tightly as he could, which was not very, sobbing into his shoulder while Ryan carried him toward his cave. Despite the about of wetness dripping out of Jeremy and the excess saliva in Ryan’s mouth, he did not particularly want to fuck Jeremy right then. _How many times was no one here to save him?_

~

Ryan’s jeans were soaked with Jeremy’s natural lube and his shirt soaked with his tears while Jeremy napped on him. He was cute when he laid on him. He looked so small and adorable, despite how bulky his frame was. Ryan's jacket helped him look smaller, with the way it was too big for him.   


Ryan was going to explode if they didn’t fuck soon, his dick was drenched from where Jeremy's pussy was sitting right on it, only Ryan's jeans and boxers in the way. It didn't help Jeremy's half hard cock was pressing against his belly too. _Come on, Omega, wake up soon so I can breed you._ He felt bad for even thinking it after what had happened, but his blood was on fire with the instinctual reaction to Jeremy’s heat. Not that he would just give in to whatever the stupid ass wild part of his brain urged him to do.

Miraculously, as though Jeremy could hear his thoughts and feel his desperation, he woke up. He shifted, rubbing his face against Ryan’s chest before sitting up and rubbing his eye with a too long sleeve. He blinked blearily at Ryan then brightened up and rubbed his face against Ryan’s.

“I missed you, Alpha,” he hummed, “I’m sorry about earlier. Usually I can fight anyone off, but I peaked badly. I couldn’t move.”

_Usually._ Ryan almost flinched at the word.

“That wasn’t your fault, don’t apologize,” he murmured, rubbing his face back, “Are you alright?”

“Yes, I’m fine,” Jeremy assured him brightly, “Will you fill me up now?”

He was bouncing a bit on Ryan’s lap, excited. Seemed like he really was fine and _very_ eager. Ryan thought he might die before he got in him.

“Fuck yes, please,” he groaned, “I’ve been here for nearly two hours, covered in your wetness.”

Jeremy reached down between them and tugged at Ryan's jeans, frowning at them.

“I don’t like this,” He grumbled, ripping the fabric apart like it was papier-mâché, “Clothes are not allowed in my cave!”

“Shall I take my jacket back then?” Ryan offered, moving to take it back.

“No!” Jeremy huffed, scowling adorably and hugging his arms around himself to stop it from being removed, “Mine!”

Ryan practically tackled him to the floor, shoving the ruins of his torn wet jeans out of the way to shove into Jeremy. Jeremy groaned, arching into him as he thrust into him in sharp, sloppy motions.

“You’re being so fucking cute!” Ryan groaned into Jeremy's neck as he rocked into his hot, slick cunt, “G-Goddamn, I just wanna make you mine over an-and over again."

He shuddered as Jeremy pulsed and squeezed around him, while holding on tightly around his shoulders. Ryan wondered how he could possibly deserve this. All the terrible, wrong things he’d done, how did he deserve Jeremy?

“A-Alpha?” Jeremy mumbled shakily, “Wh-Why are you crying? Am-Am I n-not doing good?”

“N-No, no, Omega, you’re perfect,” Ryan sniffled, “You’re beautiful an-and amazing. I-I’m so happy.”

Jeremy burst into tears, wailing loudly and Ryan wiped roughly at his own tears, chuckling slightly at Jeremy’s overwhelmed state. 

“I-I don’t wanna be a-alone any more!” Jeremy sobbed, “I-I wanna go home with A-Alpha! I-I wanna b-be with y-you always!”

_He’s being over emotional again. Poor omegas._ Such a raw deal they got in the biology lottery. 

“Shh, relax, kitten,” Ryan soothed, kissing his cheek, “We’ll talk after you pass this peak.”

“O-Okay!” Jeremy cried.

Ryan leaned back to flip him over before he moved with more purpose while Jeremy writhed under him.

“Alpha, knot me p-please! Please, I-I need your knot!” He started babbling, “I-I need you to f-fill me up! Fill me and plug me up with y-your big knot!”

The babbling went incoherent after that, devolving into most “please”, “Alpha”, and “knot” around a string of almost-words. He had a tendency to do that. _A lot._ Ryan's knot began swelling up as he drove into Jeremy who cried and begged for it. His body clenched down on it as it slipped inside him and he came on the cave floor. Ryan groaned as he came in Jeremy, falling over him. He made sure not to drop his weight fully onto him as he pressed kisses to his neck.

“You alright, darlin'?” He murmured breathlessly between the tiny kisses.

“‘M okay,” Jeremy mumbled tiredly. 

Ryan awkwardly scooped him up to carry him to the cushion he called his bed and laid them on their sides. He pulled Jeremy close to him, curling to try to make the position more comfortable for him. He hummed, pleased, as he kissed the back of Jeremy’s neck and rubbed his belly. He’d look so pretty all round, full of Ryan’s babies. But if Ryan _could,_ he wouldn’t. Jeremy had already been through enough.

“What...would they look like?” Jeremy wondered, putting his hand over Ryan’s, “If it actually worked, I mean. Half dog, half cat.”

“Mm, adorable?” Ryan offered, “They’d have such an adorable mommy.”

Jeremy giggled as Ryan pressed a dozen rapid kisses on his neck. 

_“Ry~!”_ He laughed.

Ryan laughed too, snuggling his face in Jeremy’s hair. If they _could_ have babies, they’d certainly be something. 

“About what I said,” Jeremy murmured, “About not being alone.”

“I know, you’re emotional on your heat,” Ryan muttered, recalling Jeremy’s words from the first time, “I don’t take much you say seriously, but we can talk more about it after it’s fully over, if you’d like.”

Jeremy burst into tears. _Again._ He babbled about how understanding and kind Ryan was and Ryan just shook his head with a light smile. As cute as heat Jeremy was, normal Jeremy was better. He was confident and unimpressed by Ryan. It meant he wasn’t scared of Ryan. A rarity for people who met him. He tended to intimidate people. But Jeremy wasn’t scared _and_ he trusted Ryan. Two things that meant everything to Ryan, even if they meant nothing to Jeremy.

Ryan wanted normal Jeremy to want to be with him too. But he knew that was selfish. He would take whatever Jeremy would give and not demand more, because he knew he was damn lucky to get anything.  
  
~

Ryan shuffled tiredly into the penthouse. This time Jeremy lasted seven days. They’d hunted too. And he’d had to go power wash Jeremy’s scent off him again before coming home. He was exhausted. And he was pretty sure all his impotent sperm were depleted. He didn’t have any left.

“Ry, where the fuck have you been?!” Geoff shouted.

“You know that,” Ryan grumbled as he opened the fridge.

“Ray got fucking shot!” Geoff hissed.

Ryan whipped around, fire exploding through his body as the instinct to care and protect Ray flooded through him.

“What?! When?! How?!” He demanded, “Is he-Where is he?!”

He grabbed Geoff’s suit jacket, yanking him closer.

_“Where. Is. He?”_ He growled.

“He’s at the clinic!” Geoff snapped, knocking Ryan’s hand away, “We couldn’t get a hold of you! Where the hell were you?!”

Ryan shoved him away to storm out of the place. He shifted as soon as he made it out the door, clothes falling away as he sprinted toward the clinic. _Please be okay. Please. Please. Please. Please. Please._  


He nearly knocked someone over, bolting around their legs as they opened the clinic door. He followed his nose to Ray, paws sliding on the tile and bounded into his room, jumping on his bed.

“Hey, buddy,” Ray rasped.

Ryan whimpered, sniffing at the bandage on his side. 

“What, this?” Ray grunted, “Flesh wound.”

Ryan rubbed his face against Ray’s, whimpering pathetically.

_I’m sorry. I’m sorry._

“Don’t be sorry,” Ray mumbled, patting his head, “It had nothing to do with you not being there.”

_But I could’ve protected you. I should’ve. I should’ve been here. It should be **me** injured. _

“Did you see your omega?” Ray murmured, “I didn’t tell them, I promise. Even though I’m high as shit right now.”

Ryan crawled up between Ray’s legs and rested his head on his chest. 

“How was it?” Ray asked, patting his head, “Did she cry a bunch again?”

Ryan almost visibly flinched. _She._ He hated that he was omitting facts about Jeremy. He felt like he was lying to Ray.

“You really shouldn’t lay on him in that form,” Geoff grumbled, “You’ll break his tiny body.”

He moved toward them and Ryan growled in warning.

_ I will not let you harm him. _

“Don’t alpha me right now, Ryan,” Geoff muttered as he sat beside the bed, “You know I’m not going to hurt Ray...Listen, I’m sorry I yelled earlier. I wasn’t really mad about you not being here. And I didn’t mean Ray getting injured was your fault. It wasn’t that. It was...”

He leaned forward, bracing his forearms on his knees and staring at the floor.

“I know you’re an alpha,” he murmured, “I know you don’t want to hear this, but... when we couldn’t reach you, I thought...I thought you could be hurt or dead or caught. You’re my pack, my instinct is to protect you. It doesn’t matter what you are, I’m going to worry about you. I’m going to want to protect you.”

Ryan moved, laying his head over Ray’s leg to put it by Geoff. He looked down and flattened his ears. 

_I’m sorry, Alpha._

Geoff pressed his forehead to Ryan’s.

“You need a pager or something for emergencies,” he suggested, “Stupid smart phone batteries suck.”

Ryan snorted and snapped at Geoff’s face. _Idiot._

“Alright, sappy moment over,” Geoff laughed as he pulled away. 

“Ryebread!” Gavin screeched as he burst into the room.

“Thank Christ,” Jack huffed as she followed him in.

“I told you he was fine,” Michael snorted as he brought up the rear of the parade of wolves.

Gavin grabbed him around the neck and flopped his head onto his, rubbing his cheek into Ryan’s fur. Ryan didn’t snap at him or shove him away for once. It seemed like he’d really worried them. He could be a bit accommodating this time. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no thoughts, only thots.


	3. Chapter 3

Ryan felt like a teenager buying condoms. Like he was worried about getting caught by his parents or something. _Get your shit together, Haywood. You’re a grown alpha._ He plucked the box from the shelf. Felid heat suppressants. He flipped it over.

_Works within two to three days, take preemptively for best results. May cause dizziness, drowsiness, cramps, headaches..._ Ryan winced as the list went on. These could make Jeremy very miserable. Though his heats were pure misery for him too. Either way, Ryan had to try. He didn’t want another situation like last time. Geoff going alpha, Ray getting hurt, everyone stressed as hell. That couldn’t happen again. 

Besides this, maybe Jeremy would be less miserable if they worked. Though maybe he wouldn’t want to see Ryan any more... Ryan shook his head. _No._ He couldn’t be selfish. There were more important things than his own loneliness and desire for Jeremy to be his companion.

“You’ve picked up the wrong box,” a voice spoke up beside him, “That’s felids, canids is next to it.”

They pointed. They smelled of bird. Likely some sort of tropical species based on their colorful hair. They had an employee uniform on.

“No, this is what I’m after,” he muttered, “Thank you for your concern.”

The bird raised one rainbow eyebrow at him.

“What’s your cat’s species?” They questioned.

“Mountain lion,” Ryan answered.

“You need that one then,” the bird informed him, pointing again, “You’re holding little, not big cats. Does she live in the city or out in the wild?”

“Er, the wild,” Ryan answered, “Does it make a difference?”

“Yes, you’ll want the strongest,” they answered, pointing at the top shelf, “Omegas raised in the city have adapted heats that are less strong and their scents don’t travel as far since they don’t need to go far to find a dozen alphas. Wild omegas have much stronger heats, they’re harder for alphas to resist too because they’re isolated and they need to take what they can get, basically.”

Ryan should’ve done more research on heats themselves it seemed. He’d focused entirely on Jeremy’s gender and species when he’d gone searching. But anyway, this adaptation certainly explained why Jeremy was so utterly miserable. Perhaps it even explained why he attracted canids. Ryan put back the suppressants and picked up the stronger ones.

“I’m surprised,” the bird admitted, “A canid helping out a felid. Very rare, especially around here. The felids tend to be pretty aggressive toward canids around here and you lot tend to be aggressive right back.”

Ryan looked down at the box in his hand.

“He’s...different,” he murmured, “He doesn’t care about the rivalry.”

“He?” The bird repeated, “Oh, yikes, that’s not gonna work.”

Ryan looked at them with concern.

“Regular suppressants only work on females,” they explained, “You need male specific ones. Which we don’t carry.”

Ryan sighed heavily and put the box back. _Of course._ Because nothing could be simple with Jeremy. Ryan smiled softly. Of course nothing could be simple with him, because he was amazing and special. He was worth extra effort and Ryan would be delighted to be of help to him. So he’djust have to keep searching.

“Hey, go to Tanker’s on fifth,” the employee whispered conspiratorial, “They used to carry them when I worked there. Don’t tell anyone I sent you away from here though. My boss’ll have a cow.”

Ryan chuckled lightly.

“Thank you for your help, I really appreciate it,” he murmured.

“No problem, my man,” the bird assured him, “It’s good to hear there are cats and dogs that can get along.”

Ryan smiled. _Yeah, it **was** good to hear. Maybe some day all of us can put aside our old rivalry._

~

“What is it?” Jeremy grunted, sniffling at the box.

“Heat suppressants,” Ryan muttered distractedly, “So you’ll stop having your heat.”

He was watching Jeremy drip down his thighs, mouth watering.

“You don’t want to fuck me any more?” Jeremy guessed.

“No, I definitely do,” he snorted, gesturing at his bulging jeans, “But I was away too long last time. My...pack suffered. I can still visit, if you’d like. I-I mean I want to visit, but I need to keep it down to my usual couple days.”

“Your usual?” Jeremy prompted.

Ryan was distracted, licking his lips as he stared at Jeremy’s wet thighs.

“Alpha!” Jeremy snapped.

Ryan jumped, eyes jerking up to Jeremy’s.

“Sorry, what?” He grunted.

“Your usual couple days, what does that mean?” Jeremy asked.

“Oh, I isolate myself a couple days every month,” Ryan explained, “Since I’m not my pack’s alpha, my instincts urge me to fight him for the position. I spend some time alone every month, hunting or sparring with wild wolves to stop me from tearing his throat out. Well, I did. Now I visit you. Actually, I think you’ve been much better in that regard. I submitted to him after I saw you last. Using my alpha instincts on you stops me from using them on others, I think.”

Jeremy looked down at the box.

“Won’t it go back the way it was if I take these?” He pointed out.

“Yes, probably,” Ryan confirmed, “But it’s more important to me that you’re less miserable and I still get back to my pack sooner. I can control myself as I did before.”

Predictably, Jeremy burst into tears and babbled about Ryan being so caring and compassionate. Ryan kissed his cheek and laid him flat on the cave floor. Then he ducked down to lick up Jeremy’s thigh, groaning at the taste of his wetness. So warm and heady, like come but not nearly as strong or utterly vile. Jeremy’s knees came together and he shuddered as Ryan licked over the source of the intoxicating sex smell. His slick hole quivered against Ryan’s tongue.

Jeremy moaned as Ryan’s tongue slipped into his pussy. Ryan pressed Jeremy’s thighs up further to get closer then ran his fingers through the slick dripping down over his asshole. Jeremy cried out as Ryan’s finger pressed inside him. He was babbling non-words again, accompanied by the occasional “alpha” and “fuck”. Ryan moved his tongue and finger at the same slow rhythm a moment, groaning at how Jeremy fell apart, trembling and crying. Then Ryan found his prostate.

Jeremy arched up and cried out again, legs dropping to the sides like he couldn’t keep them up any more. He shook badly, hands clawing at the cave floor as Ryan rubbed circles over his prostate and pumped his tongue in and out of his cunt. His body twisted up and he screamed as he came. Except it didn’t come from his dick, it came from his vagina, showering Ryan’s face in wetness. Ryan sputtered as he pulled away, taken by surprise.

“Perhaps should have expected that,” he muttered as he took his shirt off.

Since it was already wet, he used it to wipe his face off. Jeremy was breathing harshly, shaky where he’d slumped against the floor. Ryan fumbled with his belt to get a hand around himself. He panted as he jerked himself off, eyes roaming over Jeremy’s body. Flushed, sweaty, wetness over his thighs and on the floor, body slumped like he was utterly relaxed. _God, he looks fucking wrecked. I should’ve tried that sooner._ Ryan leaned over him to nuzzle his face as his hand moved between them. Jeremy nuzzled back, mewling as he wrapped his arms around Ryan’s neck.

“Fuck!” Ryan shouted as he came over Jeremy, “Fucking Christ.”

He dropped to his forearms, burying his face in Jeremy’s neck to press kisses there while he caught his breath. Jeremy mewled, rubbing his face against Ryan’s.

“I...don’t want to lose you,” he mumbled, “If...these things work, will you promise to come see me still?”

_Over-emotional again._ Ryan once again wished normal Jeremy liked him like heat Jeremy did.

“Yes, I promise,” he assured Jeremy, rubbing his thighs, “I’ll have to deliver them anyway, won’t I?”

“Okay, I’ll try them then,” Jeremy agreed.

Ryan puffed out a relieved sigh. _Good. Problem solved._

~

The problem was _not_ solved. The suppressants didn’t work. They didn’t even sort of work. They were utterly useless. Still, Ryan left them with instructions to take them before his next heat to see if they could work preemptively. He hoped it would, but didn’t count on it.

Jeremy’s heats were obviously a force to be reckoned with. He hit all the problem points being a male big cat in the wild, plus for whatever reason was bad enough to tempt canids. They would probably have to take him to a doctor and get prescription suppressants, but there was low chance of Jeremy agreeing to that. He hated the city and other people.

The other problem, of being away from his pack when they needed him, also wasn’t solved. He was gone seven days again and came back to find they’d been launched into a territory war with some tigers. No one was injured, but they were all as exhausted as he was. 

If he’d been there, the war may not have started. The thing about having two alphas was that it came in handy when intimidating foes. He really wished shifters were more like regular animals, so they’d be less keen on tearing each other apart. Unfortunately shifters were more like humans: ready to kill each other over any random thing. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All problems solved! -Someone whose problems are not solved.


	4. Chapter 4

Ryan couldn’t smell Jeremy as he hiked out to his cave. Eventually he got close enough to smell his base scent, but couldn’t smell his heat. Maybe the suppressants were working?

“Go away,” Jeremy grumbled as Ryan arrived.

“They’re working,” Ryan guessed.

“No, they’re not,” Jeremy hissed, “They made it come early!”

He picked up the box of suppressants and hurled it at Ryan who caught it. _Made it come early._ Ryan didn’t know that was a possibility.

“Jeremy, I’m sorry,” he murmured, “I...didn’t know this could happen.”

“Yeah, well, it _did,”_ Jeremy snorted.

_He was alone for this one. He had to suffer alone._ Ryan decided that he would do anything to stop Jeremy from suffering. 

“Jeremy, please, come back to the city with me,” Ryan requested, words rushing out, “So you don’t have to be alone again.”

“I like being alone!” Jeremy snapped, “I told you, all that bullshit I spew isn’t fucking real! I’m not lonely!”

“Okay, but suffering through your heats,” Ryan pointed out, “You don’t have to do _that_ alone. I’ll be there for them.”

“Like you were this time?” Jeremy sneered.

The words hit Ryan like a knife to the gut. 

“I...I’m sorry,” he murmured, “But I-I won’t miss another one if you j-just come back with me. I-I can make sure you’re safe.”

Jeremy grabbed the collar of Ryan’s jacket and yanked him down to eye level.

“I don’t need your protection,” He growled lowly, eyes full of fire, “You are not my alpha any more.”

Ryan thought he could actually hear his heart shattering.

“J-Jeremy, please, I-I’ll be better,” he pleaded shakily.

Jeremy shoved Ryan away.

“I-I needed you!” He cried, tears streaming down his face, “And you-you weren’t here! A-After you made them l-last longer, y-you made it come early too! I-I was in pain! I-I was h-hurting! I-I needed you an-and you weren’t here!”

He let out an anguished scream and shoved again, pushing Ryan out of his cave.

”Y-You promised!” He sobbed, pushing again, “You s-said you would be h-here! Y-You promised!”

He shoved again.

“G-Get out of here!” He shouted, “G-Get out! I-If I ever see y-your stupid wolf face on th-this mountain again, I-I will f-fucking eat you!”

“J-Jeremy, please-“

“Leave!” Jeremy screamed, shoving him one last time.

Ryan stumbled back and fell on his ass. His insides were cold as Jeremy stormed back into his cave, into the deeper part, so Ryan couldn’t see him. He stared a moment at the shadow Jeremy disappeared into before he got up to leave. He supposed he really should’ve seen this coming. Did he really think he could just _have_ Jeremy? Did he think he could just come in and fuck with Jeremy’s life and Jeremy would be happy about it? 

Did he really think an impotent asshole could ever be a good alpha?

~

Ryan tapped the steering wheel impatiently. He needed to hunt or hump something. He’d missed his usual isolation time and without Jeremy either he was agitated. Being inclosed in a small space with Ray on stakeout wasn’t helping. He hit the window button, trying to get Ray’s scent out. 

He’d always been vaguely attracted to Ray, but his newfound desperation to fuck something was heightening it. Besides, Ray was the physically weakest of the Fakes. Ryan could make him submit easily, could claim him as his. Could grab his raven hair and drag him from the car. Put him over the hood and absolutely-

Ryan slammed his fist on the other window buttons urgently as he turned his face so he couldn’t see Ray in his peripheral. Almost two months without isolation or Jeremy was making him crazy. He got too used to fucking. He didn’t crave sex _this_ badly before. He was pretty aggressive before Jeremy, but sex hadn’t been so much in the forefront of his mind. Usually he wanted to fight more than fuck, but now he felt like he _needed_ to fuck and he’d fight if he couldn’t. He would hit up a bar or a brothel, but...

He sighed, leaning his head out the window, eyes closing. He missed Jeremy. He missed holding him. Missed joking, hunting, fucking. God, he missed fucking. Missed his cute little grin and giggles. Missed his beautiful eyes and his warm body laying on his. Ryan didn’t _want_ anyone else, he wanted Jeremy. The thought of getting with someone else, especially a stranger, churned his stomach. He was a petulant child, he knew this. But he missed Jeremy so much he felt like he could still smell him.

“Alpha!” Jeremy shouted, grabbing the window frame.

“Jeremy?!” Ryan demanded, jumping in surprise, “Oh no. Oh, fuck! I’ve completely lost it! I’m hallucinating now too!”

“No, you fucking dumbass!” Jeremy grumbled, “I’m real!”

_ Smack! _

Ryan’s ears rang with the force of the slap.

“See?” Jeremy grunted.

“Don’t know if that was necessary!” Ryan huffed, rubbing his burning cheek, “What the hell are you doing here??”

“I’m si-“ Jeremy started.

He twisted and vomited violently. Ryan hurried out of the car to come to his side, offering his arm to help keep him steady. He held Jeremy’s hair from his face. _He does smell sort of sick, now that I’m paying attention._ Something cold clamped in Ryan’s guts and his his chest burned with instinct to care for Jeremy.

“I need...a doctor,” Jeremy panted weakly.

“Of course, right away,” Ryan assured him, “Er, after we get you some clothes.”

He was only wearing Ryan’s jacket and boxers. Ryan hadn’t realized he’d left behind a pair. He ushered Jeremy into the back seat and buckled his seatbelt. He wavered before finally giving into instinct and rubbing his face against Jeremy’s. Jeremy rubbed back, a tiny distressed noise coming out of him.

“I-I’m sorry,” he whimpered, “I-I didn’t mean it. I-I know it wasn’t y-your fault! I was just...j-just being stupid.”

“No, you had right to be upset,” Ryan assured him, “But I...I-I missed you so much.”

“I...missed you too,” Jeremy mumbled, “Um, Ryan...your beta is staring at me.”

“H-He’s not mine,” Ryan hastened to correct, “He’s just in my pack. That’s Ray. Ray, this is Jeremy.”

“There are so many things I’d like to point out that we all already know,” Ray muttered dryly, “So let’s just skip that. Nice to meet you, Jeremy.”

“N-Nice to meet you, Ray,” Jeremy squeaked.

Ryan kissed his cheek gently before pulling away to get in the drivers seat.

“Drop me back at my scooter,” Ray instructed, “I’ll cover for you.”

“Thank you,” Ryan murmured.

Ray didn’t speak again, but the tight look on his face seemed to indicate Ryan was in trouble again. Ryan would deal with that later though. Jeremy needed help _now._

~

Ryan fidgeted nervously as the doctor asked Jeremy a bunch of questions. He was so anxious, _he_ felt like throwing up. The doctor turned toward Jeremy when she was done typing up his answers. She raised her eyebrows at him.

“So nausea, fatigue, changes in heat,” she muttered, “Based on your history, you know what ails you, don’t you?”

Jeremy crossed his arms over his chest and squeezed his biceps nervously, not looking at her.

“Yes, I do,” he mumbled.

Ryan frowned. _I don’t understand._

“So let’s move forward,” the doctor suggested, “I can refer you to a great OB-GYN.”

_OB-GYN? Doctors for female anatomy. Is something wrong with Jeremy’s reproductive system?_ Anxiety twisted hard in Ryan’s guts. _Oh no. Did the suppressants fuck him up? Oh god, this is my fault, isn’t it??_

“Is the father aware of the pregnancy?” The doctor questioned, “Are they involved?”

Ryan stiffened, eyes going wide.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> O:


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: abortion

“H-He is,” Jeremy stammered, glancing at Ryan who was staring at him with wide eyes, “Um, i-it was that then, that caused problems with the-the early heat and the suppressants?”

“I believe the suppressants caused a hormonal imbalance,” the doctor answered, “That triggered a heat like state. This is why it came early, so to speak. Your body reacted immediately to you taking them preemptively because you were already pregnant.”

Ryan finally snapped back into existence.

“Pregnant?!” He shouted, abruptly standing.

“Oh, y-you two are- _ohh,”_ the doctor sputtered, “W-Well, then, I better go get your cup for your urine sample. J-Just to be sure.”

She beat a hasty retreat out of the room. Ryan came to Jeremy’s side.

“Pregnant,” he whispered.

His hand touched Jeremy’s belly, warmth spreading in his chest. 

“Oh, little cubs,” he breathed.

He nuzzled Jeremy’s face before leaning down to nuzzle his belly.

“Just one, I guess,” he chuckled, “Can’t expect that more than one of my dumbass salmon managed to finally swim upstream.”

Jeremy snorted.

“I didn’t think it was possible,” Ryan murmured, rubbing his face into Jeremy’s belly, “I guess it really only takes one. We did do it a lot”

“Yeah,” Jeremy muttered, “I’m getting an abortion.”

“But-! But if we-!” Ryan protested, standing up straight, “We beat the odds once, can’t we again? It c-could be viable, right? A-A little half-cat, half-dog cub. I-It could happen, r-right?”

“I’m getting an abortion,” Jeremy repeated, not looking at Ryan.

Ryan deflated, looking down at Jeremy’s belly in disappointment. He suddenly recalled Jeremy’s history. While answering the doctor’s questions, Jeremy had confirmed Ryan’s suspicions on the unfortunate number of pregnancies that didn’t end well for him or even start well for that matter. _Oh, no. I completely forgot! I’m a total asshole!_ He leaned forward, overcome with the urge to comfort Jeremy.

“Oh, Jeremy, I-I’m so sorry,” he mumbled, rubbing Jeremy’s cheek with his, “That was so selfish of me. This must be very difficult for you after everything you’ve been through.”

He hesitantly wrapped his arms around him, unsure if he was allowed to hold him.

“I-I’m sorry, Jeremy,” he murmured, “You must be hurting right now. I’m sorry. I-I’m so sorry. Whatever you need, just tell me. I’ll give you anything.”

_This is all my fault. I’m so sorry!_ Jeremy gripped at the back of his jacket, sniffling.

“I-I thought...y-you’d be mad,” he whimpered.

“No, no, of course not!” Ryan assured him, “I am a bit disappointed, but I’d never be mad about that. It’s your body and after your history, I don’t blame you for not wanting this.”

Jeremy clutched him tighter. 

“M-Maybe we could...t-try later,” he mumbled, “When...When I-I’m actually ready.”

Ryan nuzzled his ear happily, his body wiggling.

“Are you...wagging your tail right now?” Jeremy questioned dryly, “In human form?”

“D-Don’t be ridiculous!” Ryan huffed.

He gripped at his own hip, trying to stop the wagging. Jeremy burst into a fit of giggles and Ryan whined at being laughed at. 

~

Jeremy laid down on the hotel bed almost as soon as they entered the room. Ryan’s heart burned with the desire to comfort him. He smelled injured. He supposed that made sense. An abortion was a type of injury, in a way.

Ryan hovered, pacing around beside the bed. Was he allowed to lay with Jeremy? Comfort him? After being the cause of this problem?

“Ryan, please,” Jeremy whimpered, “I need you.”

Ryan was beside him, pulling him close in seconds. He pressed Jeremy to his chest, putting his hand over his heart. Jeremy pressed a shaking hand over his. 

“Th-Thank you,” he sniffled, “For everything.”

“This...is my fault,” Ryan murmured, “This is the very least I can do to try to fix what I’ve done. I’m sorry. If I had known-“

“It’s not your fault,” Jeremy interrupted firmly, “You couldn’t have predicted this.”

He wiped roughly at his eyes.

“I mean it, i-it wasn’t your fault,” he mumbled, “I-I was being emotional wh-when I pushed you out. I’m sorry.”

Ryan pulled him as close to him as he could.

“Don’t be,” he dismissed, “I think you had every right to be upset, but...d-does this mean I’m...your alpha again?”

“Y-You always were,” Jeremy answered tearfully, “I-I didn’t mean wh-what I said.”

He turned and buried his face in Ryan’s chest, crying softly. Ryan pressed a kiss to his forehead and buried his nose in Jeremy’s hair as silent tears streamed down his face. _Never again will you have to endure this pain and suffering because of me._

~

Ryan waited for Ray outside Jeremy’s hotel room, pacing back and forth in the parking lot. Ray had texted him simply with “we need to talk, where are you” and Ryan had given him the address for the hotel. He was definitely in trouble. He’d gotten a text from Geoff telling him to be safe, but otherwise he had no idea what Ray told them. 

He heard Ray’s Faggio before he saw it. He was basically tuned into all Ray frequencies, it was easy for him to hear and smell him. Ray parked next to Ryan’s car and dismounted. Ryan forced himself to stop pacing and stand still as Ray joined him.

_ Smack! _

Ryan’s head whipped to the side as Ray slapped him.

“You ever fucking lie to me again, I’ll slice your fucking nuts off,” Ray growled.

“Y-Yes, sir,” Ryan mumbled.

“Not telling the others I get,” Ray huffed, “But you know me better than that, Ry! You know I don’t give a fuck. I’m your best friend, I would never judge you for who you choose to be with.”

“I-I know,” Ryan spoke quietly, “I was just... worried. I’m sorry.”

“No more lying,” Ray ordered.

“Yes, sir.”

“How’s he doing?” Ray asked.

“Better,” Ryan answered.

“What’s wrong with him?” Ray questioned.

“He was...pregnant,” Ryan admitted.

Ray seemed to pick up on the “was” pretty quickly, wincing a bit.

“He cheated on you?” He guessed.

“No, no, it was mine,” Ryan assured, “Though...I’m not sure we’re exactly together.”

“He calls you Alpha, doesn’t he?” Ray snorted, “That means you’re together. But didn’t you say you, er, shoot blanks?”

“I do,” Ryan confirmed, “But apparently there was one live round. It’s not impossible, though very unlikely, according to the internet. And it only takes one.”

“So you fucked a lot then,” Ray snickered, “Really went searching for that one proper fish, eh?”

“Yes, asshole,” Ryan grumbled, “If you throw everything at the wall, eventually something sticks.”

“That’s weird though, isn’t it?” Ray muttered, “Canine and feline. That shouldn’t be possible.”

“Apparently, shifters can sometimes reproduce even outside species,” Ryan explained, “This isn’t the first incident of such a conception, though they tend to be riddled with... _problems._ It may not have matured properly, it could’ve had a serious defect.”

_ I wouldn’t have cared though. I would’ve loved it anyway. Our little cub still would’ve been the best, cutest cub ever. Even completely deformed, I wouldn’t care, it would still be amazing. Maybe one day... _

“Well, that’s...interesting,” Ray grunted, “Anyway, I told the others you snapped and needed to go into isolation immediately. Since you’ve been so crazy the last month or so, it was pretty believable. They’re worried about you.”

Ryan sighed, looking away.

_“I’m_ worried about you,” Ray added, “What the hell are you doing, Ry? I mean, how did this even happen?”

“Well, I went up on the mountain for isolation and he was there,” Ryan answered, “Having a heat. It tempted me.”

“Really?” Ray grunted, “Is that...normal? That doesn’t sound normal.”

“Jeremy is special,” Ryan murmured, “He attracts canids the same as felids.”

“That’s weird,” Ray muttered.

“J-Jeremy isn’t weird!” Ryan protested, “He’s just a bit different. He’s special. Unique.”

“Jesus, you are absolutely crazy about him,” Ray chuckled, shaking his head.

Ryan blushed, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Yeah, I-I guess I am,” he mumbled. 

“I’m happy for you,” Ray said, “But I wonder what you’re going to do here. How are you gonna keep this secret? It’s gonna come out eventually and the others are not gonna be as forgiving as I am.”

“I...don’t know,” Ryan admitted, “I’ll figure something out, I guess.”

“Alright, man,” Ray grunted, “You do you. Or do him, actually.”

Ryan gave him a dry look while he grinned.

“You owe me now, by the way,” Ray pointed out, “I totally completely covered for you.”

“Yes, I’ll pay you back somehow,” Ryan agreed.

“Pay me back in Taco Bell,” Ray snorted before turning serious, “And in making sure you take care of yourself. Be careful, Ry. Being totally crazy about someone can be great, but it can be bad too. Just make sure you’re not giving up everything for him.”

“Right.”

Ray said goodbye and puttered off. Ryan waved as he left then watched until he couldn’t see him any more. 

_But I **want** to give up everything for him._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah. This is angst fic.


	6. Chapter 6

“Ryan?”

Ryan jerked awake at the sound of Jeremy’s voice calling his name. He squeezed him closer.

“What is it?” He mumbled tiredly.

“Do I... _have_ to go home?” Jeremy murmured.

“Do you want to stay here?” Ryan asked, surprised.

“I wanna stay with you,” Jeremy admitted quietly.

Ryan’s ass was trying to wiggle again, trying to wag his tail, but was fortunately hindered by the fact he was laying down. He nuzzled Jeremy’s ear, humming happily.

“Of course you can stay with me,” he answered brightly, “I would like that very much.”

Jeremy relaxed slightly against him, puffing out a relieved sigh. 

“I...I won’t be a burden?” He pressed.

“Of course not!” Ryan assured, “Even if you _could_ be classified as such, it would be a burden I’d happily bear. I want to take care of you. Even if you don’t need me to, I _want_ to.”

Jeremy relaxed fully against Ryan, sniffling a bit.

“I-I’m so-Th-Thank you for everything!” He cried.

“No thanks necessary,” Ryan dismissed, “I’m selfish. Caring for you and seeing you happy makes me feel good.”

“That doesn’t make you selfish, stupid idiot!” Jeremy huffed, smacking his arm, “That makes you compassionate and kind!”

“Hmph, dunno why I got smacked for that,” Ryan grumbled.

“‘Cause you’re dumb,” Jeremy snorted.

“Alright, well, fair enough,” Ryan grunted, “Can I go back to sleep now?”

“What are you gonna do about your pack?” Jeremy questioned.

Ryan sighed.

“I dunno,” he muttered, “I guess I can google some ways to hide your scent.”

“Ray doesn’t like me, does he?” Jeremy asked suddenly.

“What makes you think that?” Ryan wondered.

“He was mad when I showed up,” Jeremy answered, “And he slapped you when he met you in the parking lot.” 

“He was mad at me for lying about you,” Ryan explained, “I didn’t tell him you were a cat or that you were male. We’re best friends, so it upset him that I would deceive him. Especially over something I should’ve known he wouldn’t care about.”

“Best friends,” Jeremy murmured, “He isn’t your mate?”

“No, definitely not,” Ryan denied, “I probably wouldn’t have approached you if I was with someone.”

“Oh, I see,” Jeremy muttered, “You only want one mate.”

“Yes, I can barely keep up with you,” Ryan snorted.

“I’d say you keep up alright,” Jeremy joked, “Though you usually look exhausted after. It’s kinda funny, actually. You stumbling around clumsily, yawning a bunch.”

“Hmph, I didn’t come to bed to get made fun of,” Ryan huffed.

Jeremy giggled and Ryan smiled softly. _I’mso glad he seems to be doing better._

~

Ryan sniffed at Jeremy at bit before leaning back.

“Well?” Jeremy prompted.

“You smell totally human,” Ryan murmured, “I can’t smell any cat on you.”

“It’s working then!” Jeremy chirped, clapping his hands together.

“Yes...it is,” Ryan grumbled.

Jeremy frowned.

“Why are you upset?” He wondered, “The soap is hiding my scent. You can go back to your pack now. Isn’t that what you wanted?”

“Yes, but-!” Ryan huffed crossing his arms, “But you don’t smell like you! I don’t like it!”

“You’re being a bit of a brat,” Jeremy snorted.

“Hmph.”

“It only lasts ten hours,” Jeremy pointed out, “I’ll be back to normal by the time you get back.”

“I guess so,” Ryan mumbled.

“You need to go now,” Jeremy ordered, pushing him toward the door, “You’ve kept your pack waiting long enough.”

“They can live without me,” Ryan snorted, “Don’t forget to call me if you need anything. Or if something happens. I made sure my phone would ring if you called. Text me if you decide to go out, so I know you’ve left. But be careful. It’s pretty dangerous to wander alone at night.”

“You are such a worrier,” Jeremy teased, “One last thing before you go.”

“Yes?”

Jeremy stood on his toes to kiss Ryan on the lips. Ryan flushed with warmth, feeling dizzy as Jeremy pulled away.

“Have a good night, Ryan,” he murmured, smiling softly.

“Y-Yeah,” Ryan mumbled, “Y-You too.”

He was in a daze the whole way to the penthouse, smiling to himself. _He gave me a goodbye kiss. Like a...like a boyfriend._ Ryan didn’t wake up from the beautiful dream until a lanky mess of limbs slammed into him.

“Ryebread!” The mess squawked, “We were so worried!”

Ryan patted Gavin’s head as everyone swarmed around him.

“You smell like a human’s been pawing over you,” Gavin muttered, sniffing at Ryan’s chest.

“You got a boyfriend while you were feral, Ry?” Geoff snorted.

“Not exactly,” Ryan mumbled, “Sort of. I don’t know.”

“You doing alright, Ry?” Jack asked softly, voice and face full of worry.

“I...” Ryan started.

He suddenly felt very small and vulnerable. The whole week he’d been getting Jeremy back on his feet and settled in, he hadn’t once had a pause in which he could process everything emotionally for himself. He felt cold as it all swept over him, a sudden longing to be comforted filled him and he shakily reached out toward Geoff.

“A-Alpha,” he whimpered.

Geoff had him in his arms immediately, cheek rubbing against his.

“Shh, I’ve got you, pup,” he soothed, “I’ve got you.”

Ryan clutched at his shirt tightly, crying into his shoulder. _We could’ve had a beautiful little cub._ It almost felt like they _did_ have one and lost it. It hurt. Badly. It made Ryan’s heart ache. He felt extremely guilty for hurting over the loss of what could’ve been when what could’ve been hurt Jeremy so badly. It felt wrong to feel sad over it. 

It hurt too that _he_ had hurt Jeremy. _He_ had caused this whole mess. Jeremy’s suffering was his fault and there was no way to go back on that now. If he could, he would. Maybe he’d even stop himself from ever approaching Jeremy in the first place. Jeremy had been happy to be alone. Then Ryan crashed into his life and devastated it like a proper blundering idiot. 

And yet Jeremy was willing to stay with him. Willing to be his mate. He was willing to forgive that Ryan was a dumbass that didn’t know what the fuck he was doing. Ryan didn’t deserve Jeremy. He didn’t deserve his pack either, crowded around him, worried about him after he’d been such an asshole. He pulled back from Geoff’s shoulder.

“I-I’m sorry,” he sniffled, rubbing at his eyes, “I d-didn’t mean to worry you.”

Geoff took Ryan’s face in his hands.

“It’s okay, pup,” he assured him, “We’re just so glad you’re alright. We’ve been worried about you these past couple months. You seemed so down. Do you wanna talk about it?”

Ryan shook his head. 

“You wanna go to work?” Geoff offered.

Ryan nodded and Geoff smiled lightly.

“Had a feeling that’s what you’d say,” he chuckled, “Let’s go steal some diamonds.”

He started to pull away, but Ryan tugged at the edge of his shirt, blushing. 

“You want another hug?” Geoff guessed.

Ryan nodded. Geoff pulled him into a hug and Ryan buried his face in his shoulder. Breathing in Geoff’s scent was relaxing, like the torrential waters inside him had calmed. He wished he was as good as Geoff at being an alpha. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope y’all are sad.


	7. Chapter 7

Ryan didn’t notice Jeremy at first because he smelled wrong. When he did finally recognize the scent, he was thankfully in the room alone because he immediately whipped around to look at the window Jeremy’s scent was wafting through. The window he’d opened for his escape. He hurried over and leaned out.

Jeremy looked up at him from where he was sitting below the window with a sheepish smile.

“H-Hey, Alpha,” he murmured, waving weakly.

“Jeremy!” Ryan hissed, “What the hell are you doing here?!”

“Um, I followed you?” Jeremy offered.

Ryan gave him a dry look. Jeremy ducked his head.

“I...got scared,” he admitted quietly, “There’s so many noises here.”

Ryan sighed heavily.

“Jeremy, you can’t follow me to work,” he muttered, “It’s very dangerous for you to be here. Just, come inside for now. I don’t like you out here on the fire escape.”

Jeremy stood and climbed into the window. 

“‘M sorry,” he mumbled, tugging on the edges of his sleeves, “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

Ryan sighed as he patted his head. _Don’t look so adorable. It’s impossible to be firm with you when you’re like that._

“It’s okay, Jeremy,” he assured him, “But you have to stay home. It’s dangerous out here.”

“I-I can help!” Jeremy suggested, “I’m a good fighter!”

“I know you are, kitten,” Ryan grunted, “But my enemies tend to carry guns.”

“Like the one outside the door?” Jeremy asked.

Ryan had just enough time to widen his eyes before Jeremy tackled him to the ground. A bullet whizzed just over Jeremy’s head as Jeremy groped Ryan’s chest. Before Ryan could say “now is not the time”, Jeremy moved in a sharp motion and one of Ryan’s knives embedded itself in the shooter’s throat. A second bullet fired wildly to the left as they dropped. 

Jeremy lifted a bit, looking like he was checking they were dead. Then he looked back down at Ryan who was just staring at him.

“I can help!” He insisted, “These muscles aren’t for show, you know!”

“Forget your muscles!” Ryan exclaimed, sitting up as he grabbed Jeremy’s shoulders, “You’re so fucking fast! Your reflexes are incredible! And that was pretty good aim too!”

“Oh, actually I was aiming for their heart,” Jeremy admitted, “I don’t have good aim.”

“Close enough,” Ryan snorted, “Shit, I need to get back to it.”

He got up and pulled the dead shooter into the room, closing the door back. Then he went back to the safe to crack it. Inside was the diamonds they were after, which he quickly stowed in his jacket. He ushered Jeremy back out the window and down to his bike where he gave him his helmet. He hoped the others wouldn’t be too mad that he’d be late to the rendezvous.

~

Ryan was only a tad late, not enough that anyone got concerned thankfully. The diamonds and the pack split up. Ray, Ryan, and Michael headed toward their next job with some of the diamonds while the others went to sell the rest of them. Ryan drove Ray and Michael out to a meeting place and they all got out to wait. Ray hopped up onto the hood, Michael sat on the front bumper, and Ryan leaned against the hood right next to the driver’s door.

“Alright, Ry, time to fess up,” Michael announced, “Who’s your boyfriend?”

“Uh, you don’t know him,” Ryan muttered.

“Then you should introduce us,” Michael suggested, “We’re all dying to know who finally managed to tame you.”

Ryan blushed hotly, grateful for the mask.

“Fuck you,” he grumbled.

“I think it’s cute what a softie you’ve turned into,” Ray snickered, “You’re like a little puppy now, it’s adorable.”

Ryan turned and slugged his thigh.

“Fuck off!” He hissed, “We’ll see who’s soft when I kick your scrawny ass, Narvaez.”

“I don’t think fluffy little teddy bears can do much damage,” Ray snorted.

Ryan jostled his shoulder, starting to shove him away when he smelled Jeremy again. He whipped around to where the smell was coming from, behind a car. _Goddamnit, Jeremy!_ Before Ryan could storm over, the gang of hyenas they were meeting showed up. As he and the others stepped up to greet them, all he could do was hope they didn’t notice Jeremy. 

“Yo, you got something for us?” Ray greeted.

“As promised,” the leader answered, “Do you have our payment?”

Ryan noted that the gang was spread out in a fan around them as though they were subtly trying to surround them. Bad news, this deal was going South. Michael stepped forward to show them the diamonds and the air seemed to shift. The gang was tensing to fight as soon as they confirmed they had the diamonds. 

As Michael opened the case, Jeremy moved. The hyena leader leaned in to check the diamonds while Jeremy skirted around them, getting behind them, just out of smelling range. He was hidden behind another car (as long as a breeze didn’t roll in) waiting for the hyenas to strike. 

After the case was closed again, they struck. The leader grabbed the case as they pulled a gun. Michael gripped their wrist, shoving the gun down and away as he slammed his boot into their crotch. Ray, the quickest of the pack, managed to pull his gun and drop the leader and another of the hyenas. Ryan kicked the wrist of the hyena nearest to him, disarming them before they were really able to aim at him.

Then Jeremy was suddenly there, slamming into the hyena with a growl. Ryan decked them and Jeremy slammed his heel into their ribs with a loud crack, sending them stumbling and smashing into the concrete. The second closest hyena to Ryan now whipped around towards Jeremy, but got Ryan’s boot to their guts for their efforts. _Don’t point a gun at my Omega, trash._ Jeremy’s heel smashed into the back of their skull as they bowed over Ryan’s foot and they dropped. 

Ryan looked around at Ray and Michael. Ray had been disarmed and was doing his best to block his opponent’s blows. Ryan started to dash forward to come to his aid, but Jeremy was faster, smashing into the hyena and lifting them off the pavement and then slamming them down into it. Ryan checked on Michael to find him snapping the last hyena’s neck. 

“Who the fuck is the midget?” He grunted, wiping blood from his mouth.

“I am not a midget,” Jeremy growled as he stomped on the hyena’s face.

“Yikes, okay, you’re not a midget,” Michael quickly corrected, putting his hands up, “Who are you?”

Jeremy looked over at Ryan nervously.

“Oh shit, is this your human boyfriend??” Michael demanded, coming towards Jeremy, “The one you were fucking when you went feral? No wonder you like him, he’s as feral as you.”

He reached toward Jeremy for some reason and Ryan was there in an instant, gripping his wrist tightly.

“Do not touch him,” he growled.

“Jeez, alright,” Michael grunted, “Let go.”

Ryan let go.

“This is Jeremy, Jeremy this is Michael,” he introduced them.

Then he turned to Jeremy, still scowling. Jeremy gave him another sheepish smile.

“‘M sorry,” he mumbled, “I...didn’t wanna be alone.”

Ryan sighed, patting Jeremy’s head again.

“It’s okay, kitten,” he assured him, “But this is very serious, you could’ve gotten hurt.”

“No!” Jeremy protested, “I’m really-“

He paused and looked down to stomp on the hyena’s face again before looking back up.

“I’m really strong!” He insisted, fists clenched in front of him, “I can help!”

“Yes, I heard you the first time,” Ryan murmured tiredly, “But I don’t need your help, Jeremy and you’re safer at home. I understand things are different and there’s a lot of change for you, but you can’t follow me into these situations. It’s dangerous and you’re distracting me by being here. Do you understand?”

Jeremy’s fists and head dropped, his shoulders slumping.

“I understand,” he mumbled dejectedly.

_Damnit. He looks so sad. You’re a monster, Haywood!_ Ryan took Jeremy’s face in his hands, making him look up at him.

“It’s okay, kitten, I’m not mad,” he spoke gently, “But you have to go home and stay there, okay?”

Jeremy nodded, looking miserable. Ryan pulled off his mask to kiss Jeremy’s cheek then ushered him into the backseat of the car. 

“Wow, he really is all soft now,” Michael snorted.

He and Ray snickered as Ryan threw them a glare.

“Let’s finish this up,” he growled, “Before I crack your thick skulls together and make an omelet.”

“If I fight more hyenas with you, will you call me kitten too?” Ray cooed jokingly.

Ryan kicked at his ankles, blushing brightly.

“Sh-Shut up!” He huffed.

“I agree, this is adorable,” Michael laughed, “You’re like a little lovesick cub. It’s so cute, I might barf.”

Ryan kicked at his ankles too, grumbling under his breath as they started cleaning up the mess of hyenas. _Assholes._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everything about this situation is probably fine.


	8. Chapter 8

“Oh my god guys!” Michael shouted into the penthouse as soon as they entered, “You will never guess who I just met!”

Ryan tensed to launch at him.

“Who?” Jack grunted, poking her head from the kitchen.

“Ryan’s boyfriend!” Ray provided cheerfully.

“Ray!” Ryan whined.

Suddenly the rest of the pack was there, crowding around.

“Really?!” Gavin squawked, “What’s he like?!”

Ryan covered his face with both hands. _Fucking kill me._

“Dude, he’s a total badass!” Michael answered, “Short, but he’s so built and fucking ruthless too. He fucking curb-stomped the fuck out of the hyena that went for Ray!”

“Of course,” Geoff chuckled, “Sounds like exactly Ry’s type.”

“The hell does that mean?” Ryan grumbled.

“It means you get a boner any time someone goes feral,” Ray snorted.

“He’s cute too,” Michael added, “And you’ll never guess what Ry’s pet name for him is!”

Ryan started towards him, growling.

“It’s kitten,” Ray chimed in.

“Ray!”

“Oh my god,” Jack snorted, covering her mouth as she tried to stifle laughter, “Kitten??”

Ryan whined as the lot of them burst into giggles.

"You guys are such assholes," he huffed, "I'm going home!"

"Wait, wait!" Geoff called, stifling laughter, "Bring him over for dinner!"

"Yeah, I wanna meet him!" Gavin agreed, bouncing excitedly. 

Ryan struggled to come up with an excuse not to bring him. If he _was_ just his human boyfriend, there was no reason for him not to meet Ryan's pack. 

"He's...not great with people," he offered.

Which was true, really. Jeremy didn't like people.

"And you are?" Jack scoffed.

"Why don't you want us to meet him?" Michael wondered, "He seems fine to me. And they must be fucking serious. He's moved in with Ry."

The rest of them (besides Ray) raised their eyebrows at Ryan in surprise. 

"He needed a place to stay," Ryan explained, looking away and gripping his bicep nervously, "It...wasn't about our relationship."

In fact he was pretty sure if Jeremy had literally anyone else, he'd have gone to them instead. After all, Ryan was the reason for his distress. His fist clenched in his jacket sleeve, his chest squeezing tightly. 

"You're an idiot," Ray grumbled, "He really likes you. Why else would he follow you around all day?"

"Follow you around?" Geoff repeated, "Was he stalking you on the job?"

"Yes, he's...not used to a big city," Ryan answered carefully, "He didn't like being left alone here."

"Did he compromise the job?" Geoff pressed, crossing his arms.

"Compromise?" Michael snorted, "This guy should be _on_ the job! He's a fucking badass."

"I am not happy that he's interrupting jobs," Geoff grumbled.

Ryan bowed until his head was lower than Geoff's.

"I'm sorry, sir," he murmured, "It won't happen again."

"Don't make claims for someone else, Ryan," Geoff scolded, "I need to meet him and hear from him that he won't be interrupting any more jobs."

"Yes, sir," Ryan mumbled.

"Jesus fucking Christ," Michael muttered, "It's like he's a fucking beta now."

Ryan's head jerked over to him and he growled lowly.

"Michael, watch it," Geoff warned.

Michael bowed his head.

"S-Sorry."

"Ryan, bring your boyfriend to dinner," Geoff ordered.

"Yes, sir," Ryan agreed.

"Good, now everyone back to what you were doing, show's over!" Geoff barked.

"Yes, Alpha," chorused the rest of the pack sarcastically.

"Don't sass me," he grumbled as he headed back for his office.

Ryan sighed heavily as everyone dispersed. Ray squeezed his wrist briefly, startling him. 

"It's gonna be okay, buddy," he assured him.

Ryan wanted to believe that. He really did.

~

Ryan was sweating badly as he led Jeremy into the penthouse. He'd basically coached Jeremy on what he should avoid mentioning and instructed him not to let slip what he was. He felt like an awful person for it. He was making Jeremy hide his identity while deceiving his pack. He was awful.

But...the FAH Pack did not get along with cats. Probably worse than even the old rivalry dictated. Michael absolutely loathed cats, Gavin was disgusted by them, and Geoff had a blanket rule of no friendly relations with cats. Jack and Ray were the only ones who seemed to have no stance on the matter. Of course Ryan just killed everything, it made no difference to him what they were. 

Everyone but Geoff was in the living room when Ryan arrived with Jeremy. They were once again quick to swarm around. Jeremy scowled at them as they did so. 

"Hi!" Gavin chirped, "I'm Gavin! You're Jeremy, right?"

"Yes," Jeremy grunted.

"You really are short!" Gavin commented, "But your arms are big! Wow, you look like you could benchpress a car!"

"Probably," Jeremy admitted.

Gavin reached out to squeeze Jeremy's arm, but Ryan caught his wrist.

"Hands off," he growled.

"Yikes, okay!" Gavin agreed, quickly retracting his hand, "Sorry, I guess you're a bit possessive, being an alpha and all."

"Anyway, I'm Jack," Jack cut in next, pushing Gavin aside, "Nice to meet you, Jeremy."

She held out her hand, but Jeremy didn't take it.

"Nice to meet you, Jack," he muttered.

"According to Michael, you're a total badass," Jack commented, retracting her hand, "Where you been hiding?"

"In the countryside," Jeremy answered, "I only recently returned to civilization."

"Ironic, isn't it?" Ray spoke up.

They all looked at him, confused.

"You were out of civilization for so long," Ray explained, "Yet you somehow made Ryan more civilized than he's ever been."

"Ray!" Ryan whined as he blushed.

"You're kidding, right?" Jeremy snorted, "He's the most civilized alpha I've ever met, even in the beginning."

"Well, I'm about to change your mind," Geoff countered as he joined the group, "Hi there, I'm Geoff."

He held his hand out toward Jeremy whose hand suddenly gripped Ryan's tightly. He refused to shake Geoff's hand as well.

"Nice to meet you, Geoff," he mumbled.

"I hear you were stalking Ryan," Geoff commented, raising an eyebrow at him as he pulled his hand back, "I just want to be sure no more jobs will be interrupted by your presence."

"No, I will stay home from now on," Jeremy murmured.

"Glad to hear it," Geoff answered, smiling warmly, "Now, dinner's ready, so why don't you tell us all about you? You're practically one of the family now, you know."

"I would prefer you didn't say that," Jeremy grumbled, "I don't like any of you."

"Well, you fit right in," Geoff snorted, "None of us really like each other than much."

The others made sarcastic agreeing noises as they all moved to the table. Once everyone was sitting and the food had been dished up, the interrogation really began.

"So, where are you from, Jeremy?" Jack asked.

"North," Jeremy answered.

"Where North?" Geoff pressed.

"Northwest," Jeremy answered.

"How'd you meet Ryebread?" Gavin wanted to know.

"Accidentally," Jeremy answered.

"Where?" Gavin pressed.

"On the mountain," Jeremy answered.

"What were you doing up there?" Gavin wondered.

"Hunting," Jeremy answered.

"Hunting what exactly?" Michael cut in.

"Wolves," Jeremy answered.

They all stopped eating to stare at him and Ryan pinched the bridge of his nose.

"He's joking," he muttered.

"But he _did_ catch one," Ray snorted.

"Shut up," Ryan hissed.

"He's right though," Jeremy murmured, "I managed to snare a wolf. A pretty big one too."

He squeezed Ryan's thigh and Ryan jolted as his face went red. Jeremy grinned at him. 

"You're cute when you're red, Alpha," he teased.

"Jeremy!" Ryan whined.

"I like you, kid," Geoff laughed, "You really do fit in."

Jeremy rolled his eyes.

"Sure," he muttered, "I'm just as much of an asshole as the rest of you."

"You should join up!" Gavin suggested, bouncing in his seat.

"No!" Ryan snapped, "He's human."

"I also don't want to," Jeremy added.

"You were the one that said you could help," Michael pointed out.

"Help _Ryan,"_ Jeremy countered, "Not you assholes."

"So you want to be his fucking bodyguard or some shit?" Michael snorted.

"No, Alpha told me to stay home," Jeremy grumbled, "So I can't protect him, I have to stay home."

Ryan winced, squeezing Jeremy's shoulder.

"You don't have to obey me, Jeremy," he mumbled, "It's not like that. I'm just worried about your safety."

"I know," Jeremy answered, smiling lightly, "I understand your reasons, even if I don't like it."

Ryan gave him a weak smile and patted his head. 

"It's weird, isn't it, that you call him Alpha?" Gavin spoke up, "Do humans have alphas?"

_Shit. Do they?_

"No idea," Jeremy admitted, "I told you, I lived out of civilization. I probably know more about wolves than humans."

"Does Ryan make you call him Alpha?" Jack wondered.

Ryan scowled at her. _I would never make Jeremy do anything!_

"No, but he loves when I do," Jeremy answered, "And I love when he calls me Omega."

"Really?" Ryan murmured, looking at him hesitantly.

"Yes, of course," Jeremy assured him, smiling softly, "We're a matching pair, Alpha and Omega."

Ryan was wiggling, leaning over to nose at Jeremy's ear as his tail tried to wag again. 

"Oh my god, you weren't kidding," Gavin giggled, "He is like a little puppy!"

Ryan growled at him as his blush returned.

"He really is," Jeremy snorted.

"Jeremy, you're supposed to be on my side!" Ryan huffed.

"I am," Jeremy snickered, "I love what a cute little puppy you are."

They all burst into laughter while Ryan whined. _Why am I always being embarrassed??_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Put in the wrong date oops


	9. Chapter 9

“Ryan?” Jeremy murmured.

“Mm?”

“You’re poking me again,” Jeremy muttered.

Ryan pulled his hips back away from Jeremy and readjusted his boner. _Go to sleep, dick, I don’t need you right now._ Jeremy turned over to face him.

“Why haven’t you been fucking me?” He asked.

“You haven’t expressed any interest,” Ryan answered.

“I’m interested,” Jeremy assured him, “I was sort of assuming you’d push me down when you wanted me.”

“I always want you,” Ryan snorted, “But I’m not going to just push you down. That would be rude and demanding.”

“So...you’re waiting for me to start it,” Jeremy guessed.

“Yes,” Ryan confirmed.

“Okay, let’s fuck now,” Jeremy demanded, yanking at Ryan’s t-shirt, “Take your stupid clothes off and fuck me.”

“I think I can handle that,” Ryan chuckled.

He turned, putting Jeremy on his back as he sat up to pull his shirt and his boxers off and toss them aside. Then he leaned down to kiss Jeremy as he pushed up between his legs. He reached down between them to run his fingers over Jeremy’s labia and into his pussy.

He wasn’t nearly as wet and loose as he usually was, but still plenty to easily take two of Ryan’s fingers deep inside him. Ryan reached down to wrap a hand around Jeremy’s cock to jerk him off as he fingered him. Jeremy’s thighs were trembling and he was groaning into Ryan’s mouth, struggling to focus on moving his lips against Ryan’s. Ryan pressed a third finger inside him and he shuddered and groaned, his head pressing back into his pillow.

“You’re so pretty when you’re losing yourself, Omega,” Ryan mused, between kissing and nipping his neck, “I could watch you writhe in pleasure forever.”

Jeremy reached for him, gripping at his shoulders.

“Fuck me!” He demanded.

“Am I not already?” Ryan teased.

“Put your cock in my cunt now!” Jeremy growled.

“Well, since you asked so nicely,” Ryan laughed.

“Asshole,” Jeremy grumbled as Ryan leaned over to his nightstand to grab a condom, “What is that?”

“Condom,” Ryan answered as he tore the wrapper, “Stops my come from getting inside you. No more unexpected pregnancies. Or well, it’s less likely. Between this and your medicine, you definitely shouldn’t get pregnant again.”

Jeremy lifted up on his elbows to watch Ryan roll it on. 

“Won’t it feel weird?” He muttered as Ryan pressed his legs up.

“Well, you’re about to find out,” Ryan snorted.

He guided his cock into Jeremy, jaw clenching and eyes closing as he pressed inside his warm, wet pussy. _God, I fucking missed this._ He tried to go slow with how much less wet Jeremy was, but he was tighter too, Ryan could feel his cunt pressing around his cock more than before and he was impatient. He was already moving his hips, breath coming out too fast, eager to fuck Jeremy. How long had it been? Two months? _So long to go without fucking Jeremy._ He reopened his eyes and shook his head. _What are you, a teenager? Control yourself._

He forced his breathing back down and pressed forward slowly, rubbing his hands over Jeremy’s hips. Jeremy was clutching the sheets tightly and his face was drawn up, but he didn’t look like he was in pain. Still, Ryan was worried as he pressed flush against him. He was quiet. Ryan leaned over and brushed Jeremy’s sweaty hair off his forehead.

“Are you alright, kitten?” He murmured.

Jeremy put his arms around Ryan’s neck and pulled him closer, pressing his face in Ryan’s shoulder and nodding shakily. 

“J-Just...th-the last time s-something was...” he mumbled, “I-In there...it was...th-they were t-taking...”

_Right, the..._ Ryan kissed his shoulder gently as his chest tightened. 

“Do you want to stop?” He asked, running a hand over Jeremy’s thigh.

Jeremy shook his head.

“No, I want you to fuck me already!” He huffed.

Ryan chuckled as he rolled his hips against Jeremy.

“So demanding,” he teased, “I think I like this way better.”

“Oh god,” Jeremy groaned, head pressing into the pillow again, “Fuck, I can feel you so much better. Oh god.”

Ryan shuddered as he pulled back slightly to get a better angle to thrust into Jeremy. Jeremy groaned breathlessly, his body trembling under Ryan. _Fuck, he sounds so fucking wrecked already._ Ryan gripped his thighs and pressed them further up as his patience wore out and he began fucking into Jeremy pretty frantically. 

Jeremy’s hands gripped at the sheets again and he arched up off the bed, howling out a drawn-out moan. Ryan moaned back as he drove harder into Jeremy and reached down to wrap his hand back around Jeremy’s cock. Jeremy cried out and his pussy squeezed, his hips jerking and his face drawing up as he came on Ryan’s cock. Ryan flushed and groaned, dropping over Jeremy and movements going sloppy as he focused on jerking Jeremy off.

“C-Come for me again,” he coaxed breathlessly, “God, I love when you come. You l-look so pretty. B-Be a good little omega and c-come on my cock again.”

Jeremy cried out, bearing down on Ryan’s cock and leaving stinging trails down his back as he came between them. _Claim,_ the wolf in Ryan urged him. Ryan growled, biting down on Jeremy’s shoulder as he let go of him to grip the sheets in his fists. He fucked into Jeremy hard and desperate, his mind going fuzzy with need as his knot swelled up. Jeremy left more claw marks on his back, moaning in his ear as he worked up to another orgasm. 

He squeezed Ryan again as his knot pressed just barely inside him and he came. He went limp, moaning softly and Ryan had enough sense left to ensure he didn’t get stuck in Jeremy as he frantically followed after him. He growled and actually tore the sheets as he came, pressing hard against Jeremy, but again making sure he didn’t push his knot inside him. 

He panted, slumping against Jeremy. He nosed at his neck, humming in contentment. Jeremy rubbed his cheek against his, humming his own satisfaction right back. Ryan smiled as he pulled back slightly. The bite on Jeremy’s shoulder caught his eye and he winced. He licked at it, whimpering.

“It’s not that bad,” Jeremy assured him, still a bit breathless, “I’m fine. Don’t do it again though. No bites.”

“Yes, of course,” Ryan murmured, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“I’m fine,” Jeremy repeated, “It didn’t hurt that much, I just don’t like it, okay?”

“Okay, I’ll try not to do it again,” Ryan agreed.

“Thank you,” Jeremy mumbled, “You’re slipping.”

Ryan reached down to take care of the condom as he pulled his softening cock the rest of the way from Jeremy. He reached over to toss it and grab tissues to wipe up Jeremy. Jeremy shivered and Ryan hastened to clean him up and get them under the covers. Jeremy turned and buried his face in Ryan’s chest, squeezing closely to him. Ryan’s chest burned with instinct to protect and comfort. He pulled Jeremy closer, rubbing his back and pressing a kiss to his forehead.

“What is it, kitten?” He asked gently, “What’s wrong?”

“Just...so cold,” Jeremy whispered.

Ryan pulled the blanket tighter around him and rubbed his hands over him, trying to warm him up. Jeremy let out a shaky breath and relaxed against him. 

“Thank you, Alpha,” he murmured, sounding tired, “I’m...so happy to be with you.”

Ryan froze in surprise before nosing against Jeremy’s ear, humming as his tail tried to wag again.

“I’m happy to be with you too,” he returned.

“I’m so glad,” Jeremy mumbled, “Good night, Ryan.”

“Good night, Jeremy.”

Ryan rubbed his hands over him still as he went limp and his breathing deepened. Ryan’s heart was pounding too hard for him to sleep for some time after Jeremy had already fallen asleep. He smiled as he brushed a hand through Jeremy’s hair.

He decided suddenly what he was going to do as he watched Jeremy peacefully sleeping. He decided that as much as he loved his pack, what he had with Jeremy was more important than whatever their problem with cats was. Jeremy was more important than any feud, any rivalry with other cats. If his pack couldn’t except that, then they weren’t really his family, were they? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My schedule is all fucked.


	10. Chapter 10

“Ryan, you said you had something to say?” Geoff prompted as the meeting drew to a close.

Ryan cleared his throat and sat up straighter.

“Yes, I think I should come clean,” he answered, “I lied to you guys about Jeremy.”

“What, he’s not your boyfriend?” Michael snorted.

“Uh, I’m...not sure about that,” Ryan admitted, “But that’s not it. Jeremy is...He isn’t human. He’s a shifter.”

“O-Kay,” Geoff grunted, “Why hide that?”

“Because he’s a felid,” Ryan confessed.

The room was quiet, dead silent a moment as his pack processed this information. Then four of them started talking at once.

“Wot?!” Gavin squawked.

“What the fuck?!” Michael shouted.

“Ryan, why the hell?!” Geoff demanded.

“Oh, Jesus, Ry,” Jack muttered, covering her eyes with one hand.

“I really like Jeremy,” Ryan spoke over the protesting, “He makes me happy. It doesn’t matter to me what sort of shifter he is.”

They were quiet a moment again. 

“I can’t try to make you break up with him,” Geoff finally spoke, looking into Ryan’s eyes, “You’re happy and I want that for you. But we do not affiliate with cats. He’s not to be seen, smelled, or heard by any of our associates or enemies. And he never enters any Fake territory unless you’ve gotten permission and he has an escort other than you. Understood?”

Ryan bowed his head.

“Yes, sir,” he murmured.

“I can’t believe you’re with a cat,” Gavin grunted, “I can’t believe he was here. Bleck. I need to shower.”

Ryan sighed heavily. It went about as well as he could’ve asked for. He hadn’t expected it to go _this_ well really. He’d sort of hoped they’d all be reluctantly willing to welcome Jeremy, but that was much more than he could’ve asked for. 

“Everyone else fuck off,” Geoff ordered, “I need to talk to Ryan alone.”

Ryan swallowed nervously, but kept his head down as the others filed out of the room. _Oh boy. I’m in trouble._

“Come here, Ryan.”

Ryan stood and came to Geoff’s side. Geoff stood and Ryan braced himself.

_ Whack! _

Ryan grunted, stumbling as Geoff clocked him. He had not been prepared for his hook to be that strong. Geoff gripped his jacket collar and put his mouth by Ryan’s ear.

“If you ever bring that cat anywhere near my omega again,” he growled, “I will castrate you, Haywood.”

“Y-Yes, Alpha,” Ryan stammered.

Geoff let him go to pull back and look into Ryan’s eyes. His were cold fire and Ryan whimpered, bowing his head.

“Do not ever lie to me again,” Geoff spoke coldly, “Or you will have to find somewhere else to belong.”

“Y-Yes, Alpha,” Ryan mumbled.

“Good boy,” Geoff praised, patting Ryan’s head, “I _am_ actually happy for you. I like seeing you so happy. I just wish he was anything but a fucking cat.”

Ryan had the strong urge to agree with whatever Geoff said, but he didn’t. He liked Jeremy being a cat. He liked every part of him. Each part of him made him what he was and he was amazing. He wished the others could see that.

“Now get back to work,” Geoff muttered.

“Yes, sir,” Ryan answered.

He headed out to the garage where Ray was waiting in the van. He slid in the driver’s seat and Ray’s head lulled over to look at him.

“That could’ve gone better,” he commented.

“Could’ve gone worse,” Ryan countered as he buckled his seatbelt.

“They’d never actually kick you out,” Ray dismissed as Ryan started the van, “Not for something like this.”

Ryan wasn’t totally convinced he was out of the doghouse just yet. 

~

Jeremy scowled at Ryan as he came in the front door. He stood up and walked over to him as he locked the excessive amount of locks on his door. Ryan smiled weakly at him as he touched his face around his right eye which was bruised and swollen from Geoff socking him.

“Who did this?” Jeremy growled.

“It doesn’t matter,” Ryan assured him tiredly, “It’s not that bad.”

Jeremy’s eyes narrowed at him.

“It was one of your pack,” he guessed, voice tight.

Ryan sighed.

“Yes, my alpha,” he admitted, “I told them you’re a cat and he was very upset with me for lying.”

Jeremy turned toward the door.

“I’m going to kill him,” he announced, starting to flip the locks.

Ryan stopped him, pulling his hands from the door.

“No, I deserved it,” he muttered, “I should never have lied to them.”

“I don’t understand you!” Jeremy huffed, “Why do you stay with people who hurt you?!”

“Guess I’m a masochist,” Ryan snorted.

“This-This isn’t fair!” Jeremy shouted, “You can’t keep getting hurt over me! You can’t keep giving me everything! I-I have nothing to give back!”

Ryan took his face into his hands, smiling softly.

“Don’t you see, kitten?” He murmured, “Being with you makes me happy. That’s all I want from you. That’s all I could ever hope for.”

Jeremy’s face twisted up like he was in pain and he squeezed Ryan’s wrists tightly.

“Idiot,” he mumbled.

“Yeah,” Ryan agreed.

He bent his head and kissed Jeremy. _I’m an absolute idiot in love._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Better and worse.


	11. Chapter 11

Ryan checked his watch, sighing in annoyance. He was going to be late getting home. Jeremy hated that. He always spent an hour clutching Ryan desperately when he came home late. Well, “always” was a relative term. He hadn’t been living with Ryan that long.

“Anxious to get home to your wife?” Michael snorted, “Or you just anxious to get away from your own kind?”

Ryan ignored him as he got out his phone to text Jeremy a heads-up. It was always worse if he didn’t give him any warning. Jeremy texted back almost immediately with confirmation. Ryan smiled lightly.

“You’d really rather be with a fucking cat than another dog, wouldn’t you?” Michael sneered.

Jeremy was still getting the hang of technology, but he seemed to grasp most of the basics. And at least Ryan didn’t have to teach him to read. Though that may have been fun. Ryan liked teaching Jeremy. His favorite classroom was his bed. He hummed to himself as he slipped his phone away, thinking of all the things he could still teach Jeremy. 

“Disgusting cat-fucker,” Michael grumbled.

Ryan considered picking up food on his way home. He was craving burgers and he’d probably be too tired to cook. Jeremy wasn’t a fan of fast food, but he’d probably already ate anyway. Ryan could always just get extra and eat it later if Jeremy didn’t want it. Where to go though, at this hour?

“Little bitch spreads his legs and that’s all you need, huh?” Michael muttered. 

Ryan slammed Michael down onto the hood of the car by his throat.

“Watch your fucking mouth, beta,” he warned. 

“Hit a nerve, did I?” Michael growled, “Too much fucking truth for you, _beta?_ Just admit that fucking whore cat has you by the dick.”

Ryan leaned over him, putting pressure on his throat. 

“I said watch it, beta,” he spoke lowly, “I will punish you for your loud mouth.”

“You really think Alpha will just let you get away with hurting me?” Michael scoffed.

“Do I seem like I give a fuck, cub?” Ryan snarled, “Do not forget that I am also an alpha. I am not like you. I do not have to follow orders. I _choose_ to.”

He leaned even closer, changing his grip to Michael’s face.

“Now tell me the real reason you hate cats so much,” he ordered.

Michael growled, starting to lift his hands to shove Ryan away, but Ryan gripped his wrists and pinned them to the car. Michael struggled against him, trying to fight.

“Stop!” Ryan barked.

Michael stilled, whimpering and looking away. 

“Be good boy and tell me why you’re really angry,” Ryan instructed much more gently.

Michael’s squeezed tightly closed and his fists shook in Ryan’s grip. 

“I had a family once,” he whispered hoarsely, “A mother and a brother. A pack of cats killed them and kidnapped me. To use as entertainment.”

Ryan stiffened.

“They...forced you?” He guessed quietly.

“No, not like that,” Michael muttered, shaking his head, “They liked to hurt me, make me fight. My...shirt, lift it.”

Ryan let go of his wrists to lift his shirt up. Michael was covered in scars. Burns, whips, knives, dozens of random lacerations. Michael pulled his shirt up higher. In the center of his chest was thick knife scars that spelled out “mutt”. 

“Michael, I’m sorry,” Ryan murmured, “I shouldn’t have made you tell me that.”

He stepped back and Michael sat up, pulling his shirt back down. 

“It’s fine,” he mumbled, “You’re...right. I shouldn’t be mad at Jeremy for what others did. But...”

He looked away, his fists clenching again.

“I can’t fucking help it!” He exclaimed, “I’m so fucking angry all the time! It won’t go away! I’ve tried so damn hard to make it go away, but the burning is always there! Like I’m on fucking fire!”

Ryan felt his own burning instinct to comfort Michael and suddenly surged forward to pull him into a hug. Michael gripped at his jacket, burying his face in Ryan’s chest. 

“Why won’t it got away?” He whispered thickly.

“Pain that deep never truly goes away,” Ryan answered, “It stays with you for life. But it doesn’t control you, Michael. You’re still moving forward. You’re doing great. It’s pretty amazing.”

“Really?” Michael sniffled.

Ryan pulled back and held his face. Michael looked up at him with hesitant, teary eyes. 

“Yes, really,” Ryan assured him firmly, “The man you’ve become, despite your pain is incredible. I’m so proud of you.”

Michael sniffled, wiping roughly at his tears as he looked away.

“That...feels really good to hear,” he admitted, "And to...finally tell someone."

Ryan hugged him again then pulled away completely.

“Ryan...I’m sorry,” he mumbled, “I’ve been a total asshole.”

“Yeah, you have,” Ryan agreed, “I understand why, but pain doesn’t excuse hurting others.”

Michael nodded sheepishly and Ryan ruffled his hair. 

“It’s okay, I forgive you,” he assured him.

“Ryan, I...I want to try,” Michael murmured, “I want to try to be Jeremy’s friend.”

“He’s not exactly a people person,” Ryan snorted, “But I’m sure you two would get along.”

_Or absolutely despise each other. One of the two._ They waited quietly a bit longer until it became apparent what they were waiting for wasn’t going down. After a quick call to Geoff, they headed out and Ryan took Michael home with him for dinner. Jeremy eyed him suspiciously, but in the end they fell into easy conversation and seemed like they really did get along. Ryan was super relieved when he took Michael home.

“Ry, thanks,” Michael muttered, “For giving me a second chance not to be an asshole.”

“You’re still an asshole,” Ryan snorted, “But not a total asshole.”

Michael slugged him, grumbling under his breath before he got out of Ryan’s car. Ryan sighed, shoulders slumping. He wasn't sure it was right, making Michael tell him what was wrong. He felt...dirty. He'd used their instincts to force Michael to do something he didn't want to do. 

Sure, maybe it was for the best that he'd gotten Michael to get it off his chest, but...was it really his place to force Michael to face his problems? Especially since the reasoning had started from a purely selfish standpoint. He just wanted Michael to quit hating Jeremy for no reason. It hadn't been right of him to make him tell him this secret. 

When he got home, Ryan immediately took a shower, scrubbing his skin raw. _Wrong._ It was wrong. _He_ was wrong. He fucked up. He was just as bad as the people who hurt Michael. The people that hurt Jeremy. The people that hurt _him._

"Ry?" Jeremy called softly, "Are you alright?"

Ryan squeezed his burning eyes closed, bracing his hands on the shower wall. He wanted to lie. He wanted to pretend. But he couldn't bring himself to.

"No," he whispered.

Jeremy slipped in the shower with him, putting his arms around him. Ryan buried his face in Jeremy's neck, breathing in his scent. He was glad the soap had worn off by then, Jeremy's real scent was soothing to him. He whimpered into Jeremy's skin.

"Shh, I've got you," Jeremy soothed, rubbing circles over his back.

Ryan relaxed somewhat, putting his arms around Jeremy. This was a side of biology Ryan hadn't really considered. An omega was almost always a calming force to an alpha. With exceptions of course, like Ryan who had never found omegas particularly calming. Until Jeremy anyway. It was easy to relax with Jeremy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two down. Sort of.


	12. Chapter 12

Ryan frowned as he entered his front door. Jeremy wasn’t on the couch waiting for him. It had only been a couple weeks, but they had fallen into a routine. Jeremy saw him off in the mornings and was always waiting in the living room when he got back.

“Jeremy?” He called.

“Kitchen!” Jeremy called back.

Ryan smiled as he closed the door and locked up all the locks. He must’ve gotten too hungry to wait on Ryan for dinner and decided to heat something up. Ryan came into the kitchen to find not Jeremy heating something up, but Jeremy pulling the casserole dish out of the oven. Ryan’s mouth watered at the heavenly scent wafting from it. Jeremy put the dish down and turned to Ryan, grinning widely.

“I did it!” He announced cheerfully.

“Did what?” Ryan wondered as he came over, sniffing at the dish, “Other than make...enchiladas?”

“No, that’s it,” Jeremy answered, “I made it!”

“Yes, you did,” Ryan agreed, “It smells amazing.”

He pried his eyes from the golden, bubbly cheese to smile at Jeremy who brightened, clasping his hands together. 

“You like it already?” He asked hopefully.

“Jeremy...did you make this for me?” Ryan questioned carefully.

Jeremy’s brightness dimmed somewhat.

“Was I...not allowed?” He mumbled.

“No, of course you’re allowed to fix food,” Ryan assured him, taking his face in his hands, “I’m just wanting to know if you did this for me or you.”

“This is...another one of those things you don’t like,” Jeremy murmured, looking away dejectedly.

“No, it’s not that I don’t like your gestures, Jeremy,” Ryan explained, “I just don’t want you to think you _have_ to do these things for me.”

“Of course I don’t _have_ to!” Jeremy huffed, hands tightening into fists, “Don’t you understand?! I _want_ to do these things!”

His eyes scorched Ryan as he glared defiantly up at him. 

“Well, as long as you want to, then I’m fine with it,” Ryan murmured, “And I’m really happy to come home to dinner. I’m starving and your enchiladas smell amazing.”

Jeremy brightened up again and Ryan pulled him into a kiss, putting his arms around him to pull him close. Jeremy practically leapt into his arms, throwing his own around Ryan’s neck. He pressed eagerly against Ryan who nearly stumbled backwards.

“Mm, maybe they can wait a few minutes?” He suggested between kisses.

Jeremy tugged Ryan’s belt open and dropped to his knees. 

“Ah, what, uh, what’re you doing?” Ryan huffed in nervous surprise.

Jeremy gave him a dry look as he opened his jeans. Ryan gripped the counter behind him as Jeremy pulled his cock out. He hadn’t done this for Ryan before. Ryan thought maybe he’d never done it for anyone. The idea of being Jeremy’s first anything sent shivers through him. Jeremy tugged his jeans and underwear partway down his thighs and leaned forward, opening his mouth to take Ryan’s cock.

Ryan shuddered at the sight and the feeling of Jeremy’s mouth closing on the head of his cock. Jeremy pushed forward, rubbing his tongue all over Ryan’s cock like he was trying to taste every part of it. Ryan groaned breathlessly, knees weak and his grip on the counter tightening even further. 

Jeremy slid forward until he choked then pulled back again and wrapped his hand around Ryan’s cock. Then he started moving back and forth, his hand and mouth moving at the same time. Ryan’s eyes closed tightly and he panted harshly.

“J-Jeremy, fuck,” he groaned, “God, f-feels so good. Fffffuck.”

Jeremy hummed around him and he choked on a moan. Jeremy picked up pace and Ryan came quickly and easily, slumping against the counter. He huffed, trying to catch his breath as Jeremy got up to get a Coke out of the fridge.

“That’s fucking gross,” he grumbled, “Why did no one say how gross that is??”

Ryan snorted as he got his clothes back up. He kissed Jeremy between his gulping of the Coke and pulled on Jeremy’s belt. Jeremy pushed his hands away and he frowned.

“What’s wrong?” He grunted.

“I came before you got here,” Jeremy admitted, “Several times. I can’t do it again.”

Ryan put his arms around him, nuzzling his ear.

“Were you thinking about me?” He teased.

“Yeah...Ry, was that...good?” Jeremy murmured hesitantly.

“It was amazing, kitten,” Ryan assured him, kissing his ear, “You’re pretty good at it.”

“I learned from the internet,” Jeremy answered brightly.

“Awe, I could’ve taught you,” Ryan pointed out, “I like teaching you.”

“I wanted to surprise you,” Jeremy muttered, “We should eat now before it gets cold.”

“Mm, but I wanna cuddle you,” Ryan pouted.

“I’ll sit in your lap while we eat,” Jeremy suggested.

Ryan enthusiastically agreed to that and they sat to eat. Jeremy chattered about everything he learned from the internet and Ryan listened, smiling lightly. He really seemed to be getting the hang of everything pretty quickly. He was a quick learner. And he looked absolutely adorable bouncing on Ryan’s lap, kicking his feet as he excitedly told Ryan what recipe he was going to try tomorrow. Ryan officially decided he was totally in love.

“Jeremy, I love you,” he spoke when there was a pause in Jeremy’s chattering.

“I love you too,” Jeremy returning, smiling around his bite of enchilada.

“Well, that went easier than I expected,” Ryan laughed.

“Why wouldn’t I love you?” Jeremy wondered, “You’re very good to me.”

“Perhaps, but that doesn’t mean you owe me your love,” Ryan hastened to assure him.

Jeremy flicked his nose.

“Ow!” Ryan grunted, holding his nose, “That hurt!”

“Dog owners do it to stop their dogs from bad behavior,” Jeremy announced, “Now every time you’re being a stupid idiot, I will correct your behavior.”

“How am I being stupid now?” Ryan huffed.

“You really think I don’t know that I don’t owe you shit?” Jeremy grumbled, “I’ve been around enough shitty alphas to understand the difference between good things as bribery and good things as genuine care. You actually care about me and I can see that.”

“I just...don’t want to be like them,” Ryan mumbled, tugging on the hem of Jeremy’s shirt, “I don’t want to make you think you have to be with me. I don’t want to force you into anything. I don’t want to-“

Jeremy flicked his nose again.

“Owww!”

“You’re not like them,” Jeremy assured him, “I’m not sure you could be if you even tried. You’re too kind.”

Ryan blushed.

“But...I’m an asshole,” he muttered, “Everyone says so.”

Jeremy flicked his nose.

“Will you cut that out?!” Ryan huffed, rubbing his nose. 

“Everyone is wrong, Ryan,” Jeremy grumbled, “Your stupid pack doesn’t know what they’re talking about! I’m sick of their bullshit! You are the kindest, most caring person I’ve ever met.”

“But I wasn’t always like how I am with you,” Ryan protested, “Before you, I was always annoyed and pushing people away.”

“You can do both,” Jeremy argued, “You’re someone who doesn’t want to let people in, but you still care about them. Don’t be an idiot.”

He took Ryan’s face into his hands and kissed him firmly.

“I wouldn’t love you if you weren’t a good guy,” he insisted, “Now stop being an idiot and eat the food your loving omega made for you or I’ll flick your nose again.”

“Alright, alright,” Ryan grumbled.

Jeremy smiled widely at him and he couldn’t help smiling back at Jeremy’s cute grin. It was too infectious. He kissed him before going back to eating and Jeremy went back to chattering. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m all sorts of fucked up. I once again may or may not have COVID. Or I’m just sick. Either way, ugghhh.


	13. Chapter 13

_It’s cold. And quiet. Dark too. You can’t see anything. That’s fine. You probably wouldn’t like to see anything anyway. There’s probably something scary out there in that cold, quiet darkness. Something horrifying. Something you can’t escape._

_It is there, you can feel it. You don’t need your eyes to feel the horror near you. It puffs icy breath over the back of your neck, sending fear shuddering through your body. If you could talk, perhaps you would plead with it to leave you alone. If you could move, perhaps you would run. Instead, all you can do is cry._

_“Pathetic,” it sneers at you._

_You are pathetic, you know this. Weak. So weak you cannot remain upright. You fall to your knees. Your tears freeze as they drip from your eyes. Your throat is raw and dry. You can only cry and whimper, your voice has left you. Just as your strength has._

_“Weak,” it taunts._

_Then it shoves you. You land face down on frozen earth. You weakly raise your head and you can see a beacon of warmth. Of light. You grip at the icy blades of grass, trying to pull yourself forward, toward the beacon. If only you had the strength to crawl faster, maybe you could get them this time._

_Suddenly, it grips your ankle, yanking you backwards, dragging you. You try to grab something to stop your backwards motion, but your hands find no purchase, scrambling uselessly over the cold ground. The icy grass stings your skin as you are dragged from the beacon._

_“Did you really think you could have it?” It snorts._

_No, you didn’t. Not really. You knew all along there was no hope. All you are is suffering. Your heart pumps pain and sorrow. You could never have anything good. But the beacon, it’s worth trying. You reach weakly for them, still sliding backwards. They reach for you._

_Fresh tears pour from your eyes as the warmth washes over your hand. For once, they’re reaching for you. Your fingertips brush. You can feel warmth shooting through you. Yes, you will have them this time. This time things will be different._

_Suddenly the beacon freezes. Frozen red rain pours from them, splattering over you. They fall, dead and frozen, eyes like marbles, staring at you without seeing. But you had been so close. You open your mouth to let out a scream of pain as you’re dragged from them._

Ryan jerked awake, screaming. 

“Ryan?? Are you okay??” Jeremy huffed, sitting up quickly, “What is it?”

Ryan panted heavily, reaching for Jeremy with shaking hands. He patted over him, searching for wounds, checking his pulse, and touching his warm face as he looked into his very living, worried eyes. He slumped a bit as he determined his beacon was in fact alive, clutching at him desperately. Jeremy put his arms around him, pulling him close.

“Shh, I’ve got you,” he murmured, rubbing Ryan’s back.

Ryan whimpered into his shoulder, holding him tightly. _Please. Please don’t take this one._

~

“Ryan?” Jeremy mumbled.

Ryan looked up from his plate. Jeremy was poking at his own plate, frowning. 

“What is it?” Ryan prompted, “You don’t like it?”

“No, not that,” Jeremy muttered, “How...long are you planning to be with me?”

Anxiety squeezed at Ryan’s throat.

“Indefinitely,” he answered quietly, “What about you?”

Jeremy didn’t answer at first. Ryan’s heart pounded as he watched Jeremy’s hesitance. Why was he so hesitant?

“Ryan, I need to tell you something,” Jeremy murmured.

Ryan’s chest was tight. _Please, don’t leave me._

“It...wasn’t yours,” Jeremy confessed, “The pregnancy. It wasn’t yours.”

_ Snap! _

Ryan and Jeremy both jumped at the sound of Ryan’s steak knife snapping from the pressure he was putting on it. _Not mine?_ Ryan struggled to understand. _Not mine._ Fire erupted in Ryan’s chest. _Not mine!_ The broken knife slammed down, rattling the dishes as it was buried in the table. _Not! Mine!_

“Who?!” Ryan growled.

“I...I d-don’t know his name,” Jeremy admitted shakily.

“You don’t know his name?!” Ryan demanded, standing abruptly, “You let him take what is mine and you don’t even know his fucking name?!”

Jeremy winced, head ducking. 

“I...didn’t,” he whispered, “I didn’t _let_ him.”

If Ryan thought he was angry before, it paled to the anger that surged through him at Jeremy’s shaky confession.

“Where. Is. He?” He grit out through his teeth, “I will ensure he never touches you again.”

“I-I don’t know,” Jeremy whimpered.

Ryan gripped the table, squeezing his eyes closed. _You’re scaring him. Relax. Anger isn’t going to help him._ He puffed out a few shaky breaths before moving around the table to crouch by Jeremy. 

“I’m sorry,” he murmured, squeezing his thigh lightly, “I didn’t mean to scare you. That must’ve been very difficult for you to share with me.”

Jeremy looked at him with wide, teary eyes.

“Y-You’re not mad?” He mumbled.

“Not at you,” Ryan assured him, “I’m sorry for yelling.”

The tears spilled from Jeremy’s eyes and he reached hesitantly for Ryan who stood to put his arms around him. He scooped him up, taking his chair as he clung tightly to him. 

“I’m sorry, kitten,” Ryan muttered, kissing his temple, “This must be so difficult for you.”

He held him closely, squeezing his burning eyes closed. Everything felt so... jumbled. Mixed up. _Wrong._ Everything he felt about the pregnancy got mixed. On one hand he was sort of glad he didn’t cause that pain for Jeremy, but he preferred that over the reality. Guilt was a small price to pay for Jeremy not being hurt like _this._ Jeremy was shaking, clutching at his jacket tightly as he buried his face in Ryan’s chest.

“I...I’m s-sorry I didn’t tell you,” he whimpered, “I-I just l-let you feel bad! I-I was s-so scared!”

“Shh, it’s okay,” Ryan soothed, “I understand. This...must be terrible. I’m so sorry.”

_I don’t know what to say, what to do._ He brushed his hand through Jeremy’s hair, pressing his lips to his forehead. _Please, someone tell me what to do._

“Y-You won’t l-leave me now?” Jeremy whimpered, “N-Now that you know I...h-he had me?”

“No, I won’t!” Ryan assured him firmly, squeezing him tightly, “Jeremy, what he did isn’t your fault! And you aren’t any different. You’re still you. I would never leave you over something like that.”

_But I **will** find him and I **will** tear him apart._


	14. Chapter 14

Ryan was blushing pretty badly, trying not to think about Jeremy’s hand in his. This was a date. They were walking by the water after eating dinner out. They were like boyfriends. Jeremy abruptly stopped walking, his chatter freezing on his tongue.

“Jer?” Ryan prompted, turning toward him, “What is it?”

“H-Home, w-we need to go home,” Jeremy stammered shakily, but he was completely frozen.

“Uh, okay?” Ryan answered, “Let’s go then.”

“I don’t think so,” an unfamiliar voice spoke up.

Jeremy’s hand turned into a vice grip in Ryan’s as Ryan turned to look at the newcomer. A man about his height with short, blonde hair and blue eyes stood several feet away, smirking. He smelled like an alpha mountain lion. Jeremy was shaking beside Ryan. Ryan felt fiery rage explode inside him. 

“He’s the one,” he spoke lowly.

“Yes,” Jeremy squeaked.

The man stepped forward and Ryan pushed Jeremy around behind him.

“You are not going to hurt him again,” Ryan growled.

The man laughed as he came closer.

“Hurting him, was I?” He mused, “Seemed like he was really enjoying himself at the time.”

Ryan’s fists trembled with how tightly he clenched them as Jeremy made a tiny whimpering sort of noise.

“Jeremy, I think you ought to go wait in the car,” he suggested quietly.

He passed back the car keys and Jeremy did not protest as he scurried away. The man tilted his head at Ryan, looking smugly amused. Ryan’s face twisted into a scowl of disgusted anger.

“I am going to tear you into pieces,” he snarled, “You will not get away with hurting my omega.”

_“Your_ omega?” The man scoffed, “You’re not even a cat. He belongs with his own kind and he belongs to me.”

Ryan lunged forward, gripping the man around the throat as he tackled him to the sand. 

~

Jeremy was shaking as he watched Ryan grappling with the other alpha. They flipped over, trading punches as they fought for control. Then the cat threw sand in Ryan’s eyes and drew a retractable baton which he slammed into Ryan’s face. Ryan pulled a knife in turn, but the cat was faster, smashing the baton into Ryan’s wrist. It was surely broken now as the knife flew from his grip.

_He’s losing,_ Jeremy realized. He recalled fighting the hyenas with Ryan. He worked better with someone. That was the thing about dogs, they almost always had backup. You hardly ever fought just one dog. _He needs a partner. I have to help him._

But he couldn’t unstick himself from his seat. He was terrified. He ached all over, remembering the pain. Remembering the fear. He couldn’t fight the alpha. All he could do was watch in horror as Ryan fought with everything he had, but still wasn’t winning. He was getting bloodier by the second. Jeremy needed to do something, but terror over the cat was winning over his terror of Ryan getting hurt. _Move, you idiot! Do something!_ Jeremy glanced over at the empty driver’s seat as a very terrible idea formed in his head.

_You never fight only one dog because they come in packs._

Before he could stop himself with common sense, he’d hopped into the driver’s seat and jammed the key into it. He mimicked Ryan, pressing his foot on the pedal that held them still as he turned the key. He gripped the little stick, moving it into the “R” position and pressed the pedal that made them move. The car jerked backwards and he yelped as he hit the other one to stop. Then he shifted the stick to “D” and pressed the go pedal, turning the steering wheel. 

He turned, speeding out of the parking lot and down the road. He was not exactly proud of his terrified shrieking as he drove toward Ryan’s pack. _Oh god, oh god, oh god! Don’t crash!_ He miraculously made it to the right place, though he accidentally smashed into a light post as he tried to make the car stay still. 

He stumbled from it, stomach rolling like it had the first time he’d ridden in a car and still did to a lesser degree. He staggered into the building and mimicked how Ryan pressed the button to get the little box to open up to take them up. _Elevator,_ he reminded himself as he stepped inside. _Coffin,_ his pounding heart seemed to argue. He pressed the button Ryan had. The metal coffin lurched up and Jeremy covered his mouth, trying not to puke.

When the doors opened, a gun and five frowns were pointed at him. He swayed, gripping at the railing. 

“Ryan...needs...help,” he rasped, “Kill me...after.”

Then he threw up.

~

Ryan didn’t want to be impressed, but he was. The cat had taken Ryan’s knife to his guts and was still obliterating Ryan’s face. Ryan was weakening quickly, having been surprised by the cat actually being a great fighter. His shaking hands and blind rage really hadn’t helped either. He should’ve controlled himself better.

Still, it wasn’t like he had done no damage to him. He’d broken the guy’s nose and at least one rib was fractured. Plus Ryan had gotten the knife in him and managed to slash him a few times. And he was tiring out too. If Ryan held onto what was left of his strength, he might be able to take him out when he finally paused to breathe which would happen any moment now.

“S-Stupid fucking mutt,” the cat huffed, “D-Dogs never b-beat cats alone! Did you really think you c-could win??”

Ryan’s ears twitched as he heard the distant sound of Ray’s scooter. He laughed, choking out blood.

“D-Dogs are never a-alone,” he choked out around his laughter.

The cat looked up in alarm at the sound of Ryan’s pack arriving and Ryan took the opportunity. With the last of his strength, he flipped them and slammed his knife in the cat’s throat. He wished he had a witty one-liner ready, but all he could do was fall sideways, consciousness fading. It was a miracle he’d stayed awake that long with all the bashing to his head.

~

Ryan struggled to force his swollen eyes open and stare at the ceiling. His first thought was “ow!” followed closely by “Jeremy!” 

“I’m here, don’t freak out,” Jeremy grunted, squeezing his arm.

Ryan relaxed, flopping his head over to look at him.

“You...okay?” He rasped weakly.

“You’re lucky your nose is broken or if flick it right now, you stupid idiot,” Jeremy grumbled, “I wasn’t even close to getting injured.”

“Actually, he was,” Ray snorted, “Geoff almost shot him in the face when he showed up at the penthouse. Anyway, I gotta tell them you’re awake now.”

He got up to leave the room. 

“T-Told you...not to go there,” Ryan mumbled.

“Yeah, but you were getting beaten to death,” Jeremy muttered, “I’m not going to just let you die rather than risk my own death. That’s fucking stupid.”

“He was...stronger than I expected,” Ryan admitted.

“No shit, dumbass,” Jeremy grumbled, “You think he got the better of me with charm?”

Ryan winced. 

“I sort of thought...your heat weakened you or-or something,” he grunted, “I...I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to imply-I mean, I w-wasn’t meaning you’re weak or-“

Jeremy flicked his nose, sending shooting pain up it and Ryan groaned miserably.

“Owww!” He huffed.

“Obviously you didn’t mean that, stupid idiot,” Jeremy growled, “Don’t apologize for shit you didn’t do.”

Ryan frowned at his twisted up face. He sounded really angry, but his face was filled with despair.

“I...I couldn’t do anything but watch,” he whispered, clutching Ryan’s hand tightly, “I w-was frozen. I was s-so scared.”

“Come here, kitten,” Ryan murmured gently, opening his arms.

Jeremy crawled into bed with him, burying his crying face into Ryan’s shoulder. Ryan held him closely, brushing his hand through his hair as he shook with sobs.

“I-I was s-so scared!” Jeremy sobbed, clutching his shirt tightly, “I-I thought we w-would both d-die!”

“I’ve got you,” Ryan soothed, “We’re gonna be okay.”

“I-I know!” Jeremy cried, “I-I didn’t think so before! I-I thought it was all gonna go b-bad, but I-We’re g-gonna be okay as l-long as we h-have each other!”

Ryan smiled lightly, kissing his temple.

“That’s right, we’re gonna be just fine,” he agreed.

He rubbed his cheek against Jeremy’s and Jeremy rubbed back, mewling softly. _Everything’s gonna work out okay._ Damn, was he in a lot of pain though. Felt like he’d been put through a meat grinder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is probably coming out of nowhere but both this and Fists Talk Louder are probably gonna end next chapter. 😅


	15. Chapter 15

Ryan already felt like minced wolf meat and that was before Gavin showed up and tackled him. He wheezed, shoving weakly at him.

“Off,” he groaned miserably, “Pain.”

Jeremy gripped Gavin’s collar and tossed him off the hospital bed, hissing viciously. The rest of Ryan’s pack flooded the room and Jeremy put himself between them and Ryan. 

“Stay away from Alpha,” he growled.

“Shh, it’s alright,” Ryan soothed weakly, tugging at Jeremy’s shirt, “They aren’t gonna hurt me.”

Jeremy settled back against his side, glaring at the others as they came forward.

“Hell of an omega you got there, Haywood,” Geoff muttered as he stood beside the bed.

Ryan smiled down at Jeremy, running his hand over his hair.

“He’s the best,” he murmured.

Jeremy grinned up at him. 

“Ryan, Jeremy, I need to tell you something,” Geoff murmured.

Jeremy tensed against Ryan who rubbed his shoulder soothingly as they looked over at Geoff.

“First of all, Ray I’m sure told Jeremy that we took care of the cat,” Geoff began, “I have a very gruesome picture I can show you for proof.”

“I’d like to see it,” Ryan requested immediately.

Geoff retrieved his phone and showed Ryan a picture of the mountain lion in several pieces. Other than the fact the man was dismembered and beheaded, there was notably a lot of blood and gore between his severed thighs. It appeared they had discovered why Ryan was fighting him. Ryan wondered if Jeremy told them or if they’d just figured it out somehow. 

“I...don’t want to look,” Jeremy mumbled, “Is it...true? He’s dead?”

“Yes, very dead,” Ryan assured him as Geoff put his phone away.

Jeremy relaxed a bit against him, puffing out a relieved sigh.

“Anyway, the restriction has also been lifted,” Geoff continued, “Jeremy, you are now free to move about our territory as much as you like. We will also offer you an escort in any friendly territory for safety, should you desire protection for any reason.”

“Thank you,” Ryan murmured, smiling softly.

“That’s not the last of it,” Geoff muttered, “From now on, Jeremy, you do not need to hide your identity. You have proven you have Ryan’s best interests at heart and we’d like to show the same by extending an offer of friendship to you. With time, perhaps we can see you in our pack or even on our crew, but for now, we’d like to call you friend.”

He held his hand out to Jeremy who hesitated.

“What do you want in return?” He asked nervously.

“We want you and Ryan to be happy,” Geoff answered softly, “You keep being good to him and let him be good to you. That’s all we ask.”

Jeremy smiled at Geoff and took his hand. They shook hands, a look of understanding passed between them and Ryan couldn’t help the tears flooding down his face. This was way more than he ever could’ve hoped for. Even being wolf hamburger couldn’t stop the warmth in his chest. 

“I’m so glad,” he sniffled, rubbing at his eyes, “But can I please have drugs now? I am in so much pain.”

Jeremy gave him a twisted up, guilty look. Ryan scowled at him and flicked his nose. Jeremy relaxed, dropping the guilty look and smiled, shaking his head. 

“That’s my thing,” he mused.

“Well, you needed correction,” Ryan huffed, pulling him back into his side, “And really, what’s the difference between a cat and a dog anyway?”

“You mean besides everything?” Jeremy muttered dryly.

“Hush you,” Ryan shushed, “I don’t want to hear your sass.”

“You’re with the wrong omega, Alpha,” Jeremy snorted.

“Hmph.”

Ryan rubbed his cheek against Jeremy’s, relaxing a bit as he breathed in his scent and waited for the nurses to come give him pain medication.

“Oh my god, I’m gay!” He suddenly realized.

His entire pack, including Jeremy, burst into laughter and he whined at them.

“I just meant usually alphas are omega-sexual!” He grumbled, “Usually alphas just like omegas no matter what or at least I thought so. But I just realized Jeremy’s the first omega I reacted so strongly to. I’ve always preferred male betas, I didn’t realize that extended to omegas. Stop laughing, you assholes! This is serious!”

They had not and did not stop their giggling until after Ryan was finally given medication. 

“So glad you’re all so fucking amused by my sexuality!” He huffed.

“The only thing that would’ve been funnier would’ve been you declaring that mid-fucking,” Jeremy snickered. 

“Jeremy!” Ryan whined, “You’re supposed to be on my side!”

“Didn’t you hear?” Jeremy laughed, “They’re all my friends now.”

“Yeah, you’re fucked, Ry,” Ray snorted, “Jeremy’s my new best friend now.”

He and Jeremy high-fived.

“Ray!” Ryan huffed.

“Awe, don’t pout, puppy,” Jeremy teased.

“Not pouting!” Ryan pouted.

Jeremy laughed, rubbing his cheek against Ryan’s.

“You’re so cute,” he cooed.

_“You’re_ cute,” Ryan grumbled, rubbing back.

“You’re both so cute I’m gonna fucking yack,” Michael snorted.

“Let’s get out before we’re all declaring how gay we are,” Ray deadpanned.

Ryan threw his pillow at them as they scurried out of the room.

“Assholes!” He hissed, ignoring the flare of pain.

“Don’t strain yourself, puppy,” Jeremy chided lightly, “Relax.”

Ryan snuggled his face in Jeremy’s shoulder, humming happily as the medicine finally kicked in. Everything’s going to go great. _Me and Jeremy are going great. The pack likes him. Is this a happy ending? For **me?**_ He squeezed his beacon of light and hope and love closer to him. Yes, yes it _was_ a happy ending. About as happy as it could be anyway and certainly happier than he’d expected. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ✨Friendship is magic✨
> 
> Anyway, another one bites the dust and all that. Thanks so much for sticking around. I’m really not sure what stories I’m working on I’ll post next. My anxiety as just been pummeling my face soo. You’ll know as soon as I do. 😅  
> As always check me out on Twitter @1stworldmutant and follow the pinned tweet to become a patron saint by donating and get chapters a day early as well as exclusive drafts. May your paths stay lit, little stars~✨!


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